Everything from the color of his shirt to the soft, warm lighting to the squeaky clean mirror... This guy fucking gets it.
A little elbow grease and your mirror won't look like Jackson Pollock brushes his teeth in there every morning
There's only one towel rack in that bathroom
From the Michael Meyers and Chucky tattoos to the Captain America watch to the diaper changing table behind him, all I see are red flags
If this guy's not from Jersey—or Staten Island—I'll eat my hat... Or his!
Because sometimes, apparently, one giant cross tattoo on your chest isn't enough
Where guys are no longer afraid of body and pubic hair
Again, this would have been another great time for a 3D dick pic
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