Grindr Fails: Hoes, Food Delivery, On the DL, and More!

January 18, 2024
ALEXANDER

Ok, we have to say that Grindr has slowed down a bit this week. Is everyone tired from the holidays? What's happening? Also...there has been a recent shortage of tops. Did the tops all make New Year Resolutions that they were going to try bottoming? Emergency alert: BRING US SOME TOPS! LOL. Anyway...here's the Grindr fails we fell in love with this week.

Eviction!

Nothing says sexy like telling a stranger all of your financial woes and then promising to do whatever it takes just to borrow some money. Ummmm, pretty sure that's low-key exchanging sex for money. In any case, there are plenty of amateur scammers out there that will ask you to send money via CashApp or something and then block you. Don't ask how we know. We just do. We love the other guy's response though. Yes, there is always government aid. LOL

Door Dash Dick!

Lol. Ok, sex and food are two of our favorite things, why not combine them? We love how this food delivery guy has very specific instructions as to what he wants to eat. P.S. Who wants to hook up after eating garlic? Also, he's a food delivery person. How quickly is he expecting to finalize the deal?

Woe is Me!

Sometimes life sucks, and sometimes a hook-up can suck even better. We just love a sassy and definitive "no" rather than just a block. Sounds like this guy is going through it. P.S. Props to the guy sending the message being totally chill, DL, and masc...nothing says, "Hi Gay!" like a good "Dude." Yeah, bro. Can't host, on the DL. Maybe he's a surfer?

Stalker Sex?

We aren't going to lie. While we love not having to travel far for a hookup, it does creep us out when someone is super super close. Like, the call is coming from inside the house. We don't mind having relations with a local neighbor, but not too close so that you have to see them every time you check the mail. Or watch him drive off to work every morning after kissing his wife goodbye. Not that we are talking from experience. Check out the fact that the sender has no pic, and no car apparently. Also, we are very concerned with the battery life of the recipient. At least he is charging it. But nothing drains the battery more than being on Grindr. Might as well say goodbye to your battery if you are on Grindr and Sniffies at the same time!