New Series Outer Banks Is The New Riverdale. Get Into It

Did someone say nymphomaniac shirtless teens looking for treasure? Someone certainly did over at Netflix, where an intriguing new twist on the nymphomaniac teen trope established by Riverdale comes to us in the form of the series Outer Banks! It's set to premiere April 15th, and according to the new titty-filled trailer will follow a group of horny teens living on the Outer Banks as they search for $400 million in gold doubloons!

Chase Stokes

Dark, mysterious dramas aimed at twelve-year-olds really are having a moment right now, with not only Riverdale, but also Chilling Adventures of Sabrina, the Rosewell reboot, and many more being all the rage. Personally Outer Banks is the first of these kinds of shows that I might be interested in actually watching. Honestly, give it to me straight, am I crazy or does anyone else think a search for buried treasure on the Outer Banks could be fun? I'm kind of excited and that makes me a little sad because I'm decades over the target audience, but, fuck it, spooky buried treasure ya'll!

And we haven't even mentioned all the skin that the trailer for Outer Banks promises. Chase Stokes seems to get the most shirtless screen time here. With that name his parents obviously wanted him to be a gay porn star, so Outer Banks is a good first step! Jonathan Daviss plays another one of the shirtless teens, while - in patented Riverdale fashion - we also get highly-fuckable dads. One of these DILFs is Charles Esten, who played a shirtless cowboy on Nashville!

TBH my excitement for this show is building even as I write this, and I feel pretty confident in saying Outer Banks is the future of Fleshbot if not Hollywood and Earth in general. Oh, you think I've lost my mind? Well you'll be sorry once I have my $400 million gold doubloons!

Let's slow that down a bit...