A New Reality Dating Show from Japan Hopes to Normalize Gay Men for the Mainstream

A New Reality Dating Show from Japan Hopes to Normalize Gay Men

Reality dating shows have come and gone, and with each iteration, the stakes are upped, the drama and overt sexuality take center stage, and the ability to grow tiresome exponentially increases. Producers are more apt to promote shenanigans and hijinx than they are to do anything to save the contestants from themselves. This is why Netflix's upcoming gay male dating series from Japan "The Boyfriend" looks to be such a refreshing change of pace.

Created by the same production team behind Japan's globally successful "Terrace House," this all-male version might be just the palette cleanser you might be searching for. As reported in The New York Times, producer Dai Ota's goal was to “portray same-sex relationships as they really are." He was referencing Japan's tendency to portray the community with stereotypical flamboyancy, camp, and outlandishness. In one of the few remaining wealthy global powers to avoid enacting much pro-gay legislation including marriage equality, it stands to reason that mainstream Japan's view of the gay community is anachronistic, to say the least.

Meet the contestants:

 

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From a Western perspective, the cast seems pretty homogenous, though their diversity comes in having men from Japan, South Korea, Taiwan, and multi-ethnic heritages. And thankfully they're not all just this side of the legal age. They range from 22 to 36 and come from the media, culinary, and tech world. And yes, they're all very cute and seemingly sweet. In fact the whole thing appears intentionally toned down in order to focus on everything but sex. This is great for doing a slow slide into the public's consciousness, but for some, it may not be the kick in the pants they feel Japanese culture needs:

"Soshi Matsuoka, the founder of Fair, an L.G.B.T.Q. advocacy group in Tokyo who has watched the series, said its mere existence 'shows a change in the society.' But he said he wished the cast talked more openly about their sexuality and the social context of the L.G.B.T.Q. community in Japan." (NYT)

 

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Similarities in upbringing, making real human connections, intrepid forays into personal feelings about being gay, and other such topics come to the forefront over getting hammered and bedding down and fighting as the series looks to closely examine young gay men's attitudes toward their own sexuality and dating in the real world. To compel the conversations, the men are given a coffee truck to operate and work in, and it's pointed out that a lot of not-typical Japanese male home activities are accomplished as a group: cooking, cleaning, and the like. They share a large, gorgeous beach house in Tateyama, naturally, and it seems that cleanliness is next to, well, whatever it is that gets dates in Japan.

“We started out wanting to highlight the young men’s friendships and personalities,” says executive producer Dai Ota. “Our focus wasn’t just on romance but also on spending time together and experiencing personal growth.” (Netflix.com)

 

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The format of the show, which starts dropping episodes on July 9th, has four TV personalities and influences commenting on the participants' behavior, including one fierce queen, Durian Lollobrigida, who wanted to participate as a sort of protective mother. “I thought it wouldn’t be good if heterosexual people (his fellow panel members) who are in the majority were just watching gay men mingle. So I thought it was necessary for someone to be there to act as a translator.” But thankfully he found his initial fears to be unfounded. Yoshimi Tokui also returns from his stint on "Terrace House" as one of the panel members. Commentators Megumi, Chiaki Horan, Thelma Aoyama, Durian Lollobrigida, and  Yoshimi Tokui can all be found on their IG accounts.

The ultimate goal of the program seems to be to make money to normalize gay men in the eyes of mainstream Japan in a lighthearted, relaxed manner. Says Lollobrigida: “In order to get various L.G.B.T.Q.+ rights, of course raising our voices and protesting is important. But at the same time, I think it is important to normalize it through entertainment.”

Japan's first same-sex romance reality series, "The Boyfriend," premieres July 9!
Nine men moving into a beach house, working at a coffee truck, and searching for love sounds like the perfect recipe for deep friendships and self-discovery. #TheBoyfriendJP #LoveIsLove #LGBTQ pic.twitter.com/g78rLX6m4s

— Bayanihan Today (@BayanihanToday) June 5, 2024

Will you be watching "The Boyfriend?"

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