Where Are They Now: Mitch Vaughn Talks Going from Love Illusionist to Soccer Mom

April 6, 2023
JACK

In the 2010s, there was an absolutely adorable fella who emerged at Cocksure Men with a sexy shaved head, a sweet smile, an irresistible "ah-shucks" attitude, and a beautiful buff and tatted body that just made you want to give yourself up to him instantly. Add to all this one of the most unbelievable far-shooting cumshots in all of porn and you have yourself, Mitch Vaughn.

Versatile Mitch could combine being as sweet as pie with being macho as fuck like no other. Is it any wonder this guy won the coveted "So You Think You Can Fuck" competition?

Across all the major studios and in a wide variety of scenes, Mitch was just a huge audience favorite. It was porn's loss when Mitch made a quiet departure from the business in 2018.

Now five years later, the brave and still adorable Mitch is coming forward and sharing his deep struggles with mental health and how he has survived and begun to heal.

This is a very special guy and Fleshbot is grateful for what he is sharing.

As you will read in this revealing and intimate interview, Mitch is a guy of rare depth, intelligence, and empathy. He's a philosopher as well as a sex god. Jeez, if we didn't think he was hot enough already!

Could you tell us about your journey from joining the porn industry to becoming famous?

Famous?! Ha! The only people who might ascribe me as that would be sometimes my mom or occasionally the people who pop up in my dreams (and even then, I can already hear the wispy apparitions, bent over in laughter!). The journey is 1000% the right word for it and one which even now seems more surreal than something from my actual past.

I just kinda fell into it.

It was 2010. I was the youngest executive at the private bank where I worked. I had built an entire department from the ground up, but working 14-hour days, 6 days a week had taken its toll (I had hair when I started, lol). I had burnt out! Most of my core friend group had pretty much given up on me and moved on, not that I blame them. I had no life outside of work. Then, one rainy day in August, I was sitting at my desk staring out the window and had the realization that if I didn’t get out immediately, I would be chained to that desk for the rest of my life. That thought both terrified and saddened me. I stood up, quietly packed my things, and drove away from my quarter of a million dollar annual salary, never once looking in the rearview mirror. Then, I just sort of kept driving. I wasn’t sure what I was going to do next, but I knew it wasn’t going to be what I had been doing.

I finally ran out of gas in North Las Vegas and thought “Sure! Maybe I’ll live here for a while.” So, with an eye on getting some much-needed R&R and a dogged determination to achieve the world’s best tan and get laid so often that I’d come to know all the hotel valets by name and have a standing elevator key waiting at every front desk, I made Vegas my new home. I had no idea how prophetic that line of thought would come to be.

A few weeks after arriving in Sin City, I was out one night having drinks with a friend and ogling some near-naked guys dancing on a box. My friend casually and jokingly asked me, “Would you ever do porn?” Jokingly and more focused on mentally fucking the dancer in front of us I said, “Totally! What gay boy wouldn’t??”

“You really would?”

“Yes. Let me just respond to the hundreds of studios and producers who’ve been messaging me non-stop since last week!”—rolled my eyes so hard I nearly had a stroke, “What studio would ever want to hire me??"

Apparently, my friend decided to seek out what studio indeed. About a month later, I got two voicemails on the same day from unknown numbers. One was from Cocksure Men and the other from Titan, both stating they had received my application but had some questions about the gaps in the information I provided and a lack of “work-appropriate” photos. It took me about a day to recall the conversation from that night at the club. In full annoyance, I asked my friend if he had sent these studios an application as if he were me. In a curiously casual response, he said “Yeah. I figured if they didn’t call you, you’d never know. And if they did, you could put your money where your mouth is.” Even more curiously casual still, I simply responded “Oh, ok.” Challenge accepted.

So, after agreeing to the booking request and a subsequent 12-month contract with Cocksure Men, Mitch Vaughn was born.

I opted to keep my real first name—feeling that doing so would bring an air of authenticity to him by tying him to an actual person. Moreover, I discovered that this helped make life easier for me by not having to establish which scenarios I needed to be my character and which scenarios I could just be me. That may sound like an unnecessary distinction but having experienced this very real quandary with others in the industry, I was grateful to be 100% Mitch 100% of the time. My dear friend, a drag queen, let me bear her last name.

What were some of your favorite and least favorite parts of being a porn star?

Honestly, my favorite part was the people I met. Despite existing in the shadows and being cast as society’s underbelly, gay porn actors are some of the most genuine, driven, thoughtful, and determined people I have ever had the pleasure of knowing. As homosexuals, we are used to being pushed to the darkest corners of society and being spoken of and to using whispered tones in an unsavory lexicon. Additionally, there is the fact that in any given situation, LGBTQ+ individuals must work exponentially harder than their straight counterparts to achieve the same levels of success and respect. The adult genre and sex workers and Love Illusionists (I feel the term ‘Porn Star’ has been bastardized beyond repair) have played a pivotal role in the gains thus far made by making a largely amoral society to come to grips with the fact that its preferred version of history in which humans are nothing if not morally and ethically absolute—whatever that means, is nothing more than a fever dream of pure fantasy.

My least favorite part of creating illusions on film? Fantasy, although natural, healthy, and wildly fun, is not always comfortable. Sex for 5+ hours in the sand, in a mosquito-infested wilderness, on top of a piano, in freezing cold rain, in a sweltering abandoned warehouse, or my personal hell—the back seat of a car. It hurts! Lol. It may look good when edited by the director and cameraman, but behind the scenes, it is anything but hot and sexy! My idea of an ideal setting: a nice comfortable bed, no apple boxes or knee padding, absent of bugs and dirt getting stuck in places you never even knew you had, for exactly 30 minutes with a hot shower and cuddling after.

You were in the business at a very transitional time in the early 2010s, when the rise of OnlyFans and personal webcams rose. What was that period like? What changes did you see?

The early 10s was the birth of OnlyFans and similar sites, the mass adoption of camera-possessing smartphones, and (thankfully) an increasingly enlightened cross-section of society unencumbered by “tradition” and influenced less and less by the mass brainwashing from organized religion. That time was the jumping-off point for things that I can only view as a benefit to society. Sex, even outside of procreation, is fundamental to our species. It is as fundamental to human life as water or air. Those who recreate that on film or as a service deserve society’s gratitude, not its feigned disgust or manufactured disdain. It is sad to see foundational studios that have seemingly been around forever continue to decline, affecting various stakeholders, including the illusionists like myself. However, by putting it all in the hands of most of the Earth’s human inhabitants with their very own top-notch camera equipment and making them be their own camera crew, executive producer, talent agent, and editor, we have created the potential for billions of additional stories to be told.

Who were some of your favorite fellow performers? Still in touch with any? Is there anybody you wish you had worked with? Favorite porn star of all time?

Hmm, that is a tough question. I truly did enjoy nearly all my scene partners. Of all my scenes, only two come to mind that I recall being challenging, regarding the person I was working with. Unfortunately, I haven’t really stayed in touch with anyone from the industry. I think being so far out of the epicenter, geographically. Also, for the first while after being out of it, I wasn’t really in the best place mentally, and that caused connections to fade. That is something I wish I had handled differently and better. As far as my all-time favorite actor, I would have to still say, Matthew Rush! He was one of the first guys I watched, and someone I still watch! And on top of that, he is the most amazing guy and so sweet and kind, which makes him even sexier!

What was your favorite scene and why?

I’d have to say my favorite scene was the one I did for Men Over 30, with Bobby Hart. The setup was that I was a realtor showing a property to a client (Bobby) and it somehow morphed into us having sex in various places throughout the house. It was probably one of the freest scenes I ever did. I found Bobby extremely sexy and his personality and carefree spirit just added to it. I remember during filming, we had to stop a couple of times because we would get uncomfortably close to cumming and blowing the entire rest of the scene. When I was finally able to calm myself down enough to continue, we basically just had continuous sex for like four hours, even while cameras were not rolling, with the film crew popping back in and out as they saw points they wanted to capture on film. This was a singularly unique experience for me and one I think about often with fond memory.

Sex is a very interesting concept and exists far from its often pigeon-holed simplified derivatives. On one side it is solely a product of “love” and confined as the singular respondent in the call to procreate. On the other side, it's an animalistic feelingless act of selfishness, seen as a holdover from our distant past, as we’ve continued our evolutionary journey toward domestication. As with so many of the facets of what it is that actually makes us human, sex is far more nuanced and anything but black and white. The way I see it, sex exists on a spectrum. Having grown up in a very religious home, where only a single plot point from that spectrum—love, existed, I’m thankful to my time in the industry for planting the seeds from which this theory grows.

You retired fairly suddenly and quietly. What brought on your exit?

Technically, I never officially retired, which was intentional. I never wanted to be one of those guys who does his farewell tour, complete with Twitter PR blitzes and Facebook posts (TikTok, Instagram, or whatever the youth is using these days,) only to return a short time after and in an ode-to-Cher go on a Farewell Tour, Encore tour, Final Farewell tour, only to have that morph into the Finale that then leads to… you get my point.

I always said I would keep filming until studios stopped calling, which is kind of exactly what happened. Not that I’m complaining, I had a fantastic run! I learned a lot and met incredible people. I got to live out a fantasy that every guy has, but most never get the chance (until OnlyFans made everyone porn stars, I guess! Lol.) The experiences and memories I gained from this adventure are among some of my favorites and I wouldn’t trade them for anything.

Honestly, the timing of when things wound down for Mitch Vaughn was impeccable. I’ve dealt with severe depression since my mid-twenties and the last year I was filming things had sharply intensified. I couldn’t give the performances I wanted (or that I’m sure directors and studios were expecting). Thankfully that was at the end, which gave me years of performances I am proud of, and I hope viewers were able to enjoy. This is also the reason I left LA in 2018. Out of concern, my family staged a sort of intervention and pretty much just showed up with boxes and a moving truck so I would be closer to a support group. As much as I truly hated leaving and regret the unknown missed opportunities, and as much as I deeply miss the friends I had made and my kickass West Hollywood penthouse, it is because of that intervention that I am still here to have this conversation with you. Things have since improved and continue to, albeit at a much slower pace than I care for. Getting into that otherworldly hole is far easier than digging yourself back out.

Even with your struggles with depression, you are one performer who never seemed to have any serious issues with addiction which has affected so many performers over the years. How were you able to keep such a level head? Or were you?

Yes and no. As with all things me-adjacent, it’s complicated. For the bulk of my time in the industry, I was able to avoid the seemingly unavoidable. I’m one of the lucky ones! As far as drugs were concerned, I played with fire but somehow still managed to get out with only a few singed hairs. I know many, many of our fellow brothers and sisters around the world aren’t so fortunate. Depression and despair are the results, as the current understanding of the body goes, of chemical imbalances—manufactured by the brain in ways we are barely beginning to understand. That doesn’t make them any less real or any less dangerous and life-altering. I say the same about all mental health issues and addictions. Having dealt with both, I’ve fortunately been able to replace my utter ignorance and arrogance surrounding mental health trauma and addiction with first-hand knowledge and an absolute ton of empathy and love! This is something I’m so very grateful to the Universe for teaching me and I hope, as I start to emerge out of this dark and densely wooded area of my life’s journey, I can impart it to others.

If I could offer you, the reader, a single piece of advice, it would be this: PLEASE BE KIND TO YOURSELF. Remind yourself how truly amazing and beautiful you are! Repeatedly tell yourself that you are special, exactly as you are! Out of all the trillions of billions of stars in the cosmos, and the unimaginable number of planets that orbit them, the exact arrangement of billions of years old stardust that is you, only happens once. This alone makes you incomprehensibly priceless! And intrinsically worthy of love, respect, and admiration, specifically from yourself. Don’t ever let anyone, including the other voice participating—especially the other voice—in your innermost dialogues, convince you of anything less!

Do you follow the industry and the performers of today? Does anybody impress you?

That all depends on what you mean by follow and impress. If you mean who do I find hot and enjoy watching, which I am going to assume you do, I’d have to say some of my favorites would be Marcelo Mastro, Brent Everett, Caio Veyron, Fabio Toba, Rafael Alencar, Xavier Hux—woof! All are guys I would have loved to or would love to work with. There are just way too many to list! Lol.

Would you ever consider a comeback?

Absolutely! I think that would be a lot of fun. Although I would need a little time to hit the gym and so I’m somewhat presentable, say like 2024? Haha. I think it would be interesting and an amazing experience to film at this point in my life, a little older and hopefully wiser. And maybe have the chance to work with some of the performers I didn’t get to the first time around!

Could you tell us about your life today?

I’m sorry, I don’t understand. Could you please repeat the question? Lol. If being a porn star (love illusionist) were like, well, being a porn star, my life today would be the equivalent of a Honda Odyssey-driving soccer mom, whose idea of excitement is the upcoming bid for PTA president and whose day consists of trips to the recycling center, math competition practice sessions, and local political protests. Lol.

Ok, so maybe I drive a Volvo S40 and I don’t have any offpsring—unless you count my friend’s adorable golden retriever/Siberian husky puppy who I frequently dog-sit (he likes me more than his dad, but don’t tell him that) and substitute math competitions with my one hour morning commute and you get a pretty accurate picture. Haha. Things are good. Still perpetually single, but I guess that probably has something to do with never going out or meeting guys. Funny how that works, right? So in that light, I’ll be accepting husband applications next week!

I have a job that I mostly enjoy, doing solar contract reassignments in the clean energy division of a major US electric vehicle producer. It satiates my need to do something positive for the environment and helps me sleep at night, in spite of working for one of the world’s richest people. I’ve gotten to enjoy the last few years rebuilding family relationships, since I am much closer geographically, which is nothing short of priceless! Utah has been a good place to have a bit of quiet time to focus and push out all the other noise. This has proved necessary with the insane rollercoaster we’ve all been on for the last three years with COVID, lockdown, the current moment’s political unrest, and the growing climate chaos. It’s all been a reminder to focus on things that matter and let go of things that don’t. All this has been particularly challenging with my preexisting mental health struggles and my more-than-slight propensity toward nihilism. However, the original nihilist and philosopher Friedrich Nietzsche famously once said, “There are no beautiful surfaces without a terrible depth.” When taken all together, it has been a master class in learning to love myself and invaluable in learning to love others, despite major differences.

All joking aside, life is good. I feel that I’m working toward an equal balance of knowing my value and worth, as well as having a realistic view of what I need to work on to become a better citizen of humanity. I’ve been given so many wonderful opportunities to enjoy different vantage points along my journey. To just enjoy the view and realize that it’s far less about the destination and much more about the trip and my fellow travelers. My experience in the adult film industry, and my experiences at large, have taught and still teach me that it’s all about love. Life, our purpose, why we are here. It is all to learn how to love others and to learn to love ourselves. It is because of your unique path, rather than in spite of it, that you have become this beautiful and amazing being. To again quote Nietzsche, “No one can construct for you the bridge upon which precisely you must cross the stream of life, no one but you yourself alone.”

What should people know about the real man who made Mitch Vaughn?

Only that he is not nearly as polished or as put together as he may appear on TV. I’m never very good at just talking about myself in general, unprompted. Plus, I think your readers have probably learned just about all they care to, given my novel-esque answers. Lol.

Photos and video courtesy of Raging Stallion.

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