Gay of Thrones: “Summer Epic” or Epic Fail?

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MEN.com debuted their new "summer epic" called Gay of Thrones on Independence Day weekend, so I'm just getting caught up. It's a four-part series that you might expect features power struggles, men fucking in castles, and maybe a little brotherly incest. Unfortunately, but not surprising, MEN.com's Gay of Thrones has none of this.

I have defended MEN.com when accused of their inability to create good plot-driven videos – I still maintain that they have filmed some good ones – but they're losing me and this mouth full of crow needs a bit of ketchup. After their dismal military theme in P.O.W., I never did get back to the other episodes to see who or what soldier Paddy O'Brian was running from. But he gets gang banged in the final scene on July 18, so I'll be heading back for a look.

The thing about Gay of Thrones is that the sex so far is good and so are the pairings. In the first scene, Abraham Al Malek is wearing Dothraki-style clothing and hysterically bad dark eyeshadow – is there not a drag queen anywhere at MEN.com head quarters? – and he fucks slave Toby Dutch by a river. 

Watch Gay of Thrones at MEN.com

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In the second episode, servant Paul Walker shaves his master's chest and talks to Dato Foland about becoming the king. But between Foland's Russian accent and his inability to speak above a mumble, I have no idea what he said to Walker before swallowing his dick. Then they flip flop fuck on various pieces of furniture and the floor.

But beyond the good sex, MEN.com completely misses the mark. You couldn't even call Gay of Thrones a bad rip-off of the television show. In the second scene, occasionally a church bell gongs or a horse neighs outside the "castle" window and the room's furnishings don't look like a typical bedroom, but that's about as close to Game of Thrones as it gets.

A studio can't just call something "epic" in their ads and make it so, it has to be grand in scope and size, it needs to verge on something we've never seen in porn before – then it's EPIC. I enjoyed the sex in both scenes: Abraham Al Malek has a big uncut cock and Toby Dutch excels at sucking it and Dato Foland is a sexy fucker who ends up completely drenched in two loads of cum. So watch Gay of Thrones for the hot sex, but check your Games of Thrones expectations at the castle door.

Watch Gay of Thrones at MEN.com

Watch Gay of Thrones at MEN.com