River Viiperi Mitigates Toilet Paper Shortage By Shitting In Diapers

March 30, 2020
HIS_EXCELLENCY

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I really don’t get why everyone is so worried about toilet paper. 🤷🏼‍♂️ #StayHome

A post shared by RIVER VIIPERI (@riverviiperi) on Mar 24, 2020 at 7:59am PDT

While the world continues to scramble for toilet paper, Male Model River Viiperi has come up with a different solution entirely that truly might be a supply chain game changer! This supermodel said "Turn to the left, Poop. Now turn to the right, Poop. Sashay, shantay!" River is avoiding wiping altogether by simply pooping in diapers, and I stan so damn hard!

In his latest Instagram picture River sips on a beer in front of the fridge wearing, yas kween, diapers. He even captions the photo with "I really don’t get why everyone is so worried about toilet paper." Followed by a shrug and the hashtag #StayHome. Now that's BDE - Big Diaper Energy!

What's even better than this ingenious solution to our toilet paper shortage is that River Viiperi is looking as drop-dead damn sexy as always. His abs, chest, and adorable puppy dog expression just refuse to quit, and the added bonus of seeing River in adult diapers is that the absorbent lining gives him a mouthwatering meaty tuck!

Honestly wiping is so overrated - some might say it's downright shitty - and as we search for any silver linings to come out of the coronavirus pandemic, let's hope that the normalization of diapers is one of them. Am I wearing a pair right now? Well, it Depends.

Corrections and clarifications: Wait I just realized that if you shit yourself you probably have to wipe it off with something anyway? We have reached out to River's management team for a statement.

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During the quarantine I’m going to accept challenges. A lot of you have been seeing lately that I can pretty much do ANYTHING 😏. Comment below something you think I can’t do, I’ll be accepting 10 Challenges that I think could be fun to prove ya’ll wrong. Let the game begin. #ICanDoAnythingYouCanDoBetter 😘

A post shared by RIVER VIIPERI (@riverviiperi) on Mar 15, 2020 at 2:09pm PDT

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Few more weeks and I’ll be in Paradise again 👽

A post shared by RIVER VIIPERI (@riverviiperi) on Mar 6, 2020 at 9:36am PST