“Boys @ Work” Endanger Themselves (And Our Eyes, Our Eyes!)

Hello, porn studio people? Haven't you been paying attention to us? What did we say just a few days ago? Wasn't it something about backing off the workplace clichés? And yet, what do you keep giving us? That's right: more workplace clichés! (And not the clever kind our readers have been coming up with either!)

Not to point fingers--but we're looking at you, Man's Art, with your just-released "Boys @ Work". Not only could you not be bothered to type out "at", but you substituted an asperand for it. In days of yore--say, 1997--that might've been a mildly clever title if your film were about hot web designers and the mischief they get up to after hours, when all that Jolt cola finally hits their systems and they take off their clothes and start coding like horned up jackrabbits. But now it just feels lazy.

And can we also say something about that stylist you hired, who looks like he was last employed during the Jeff Stryker era? Those highlights! Those too-artful smudges of faux machine grease! That hair gel that looks like it was troweled on with a sledgehammer! Indeed, these are a few of our least favorite things.

And speaking of sledgehammers: is that a sledgehammer down the front of that guy's pants on the left? And does blondie really know what he's doing with that reciprocating saw? Have you properly trained these people? Just because you're making a porn movie--and, like, European--doesn't mean you can't be cited for safety violations. Keep it up and the next knock at the door won't be a scantily clad pizza boy--it'll be OSHA. We're just warning you because we care.

• "Boys @ Work" (TLAvideo.com)
• Man's Art (mans-art.com)