Our Favorite Muscle Worship Videos On YouTube

One of these videos features an insanely cocky muscle stud with a thick Eastern European accent crushing a watermelon with his thighs. And that's just the tip of the bulging, veiny iceberg that is YouTube's Best Muscle Worship Videos!

As we unite with our fellow fat fatties for the annual exercise in self-loathing we call "New Year's Resolutions," we recognize that not everyone working on their personal fitness in 2011 is necessarily trying to lose weight. For all of you scrawny, 98-lbs. weaklings out there, consider the men in these videos inspiration for the weight pumping, protein powder guzzling days ahead. For our part, we just love the sight of a big, handsome Gorilla strutting his stuff for the camera. The muscle fetish is one of our favorite fetishes because it manages to transform the entire body into one tumescent, pulsating sex organ. Check out the videos to see what we mean.

If Arnold Schwarzenegger has taught us nothing else it's this: don't elect actor/bodybuilders to govern one of the largest, most highly populated states in the country. Luckily, he has taught us something else: all bodybuilders should have Eastern European and/or Russian accents. Something about those harshly lyrical tones really accentuates the buffness. Not that this guy's buffness isn't perfectly accentuated when he crushes a watermelon with his thighs.

"Take a look at this body…Fuck." One of our favorite hallmarks of the muscle worship video is the muscle worshipee's verbal cockiness. When done well, it can be extremely hot.

Alain Lamas, a pornstar who's filmed solo scenes for Raging Stallion, Cocksure Men, and Circle Jerk Boys, got his start making amateur muscle worship clips on Xtube. He is, without a doubt, the king of the cocky, verbal muscle gods.

This hotty, on the other hand, could probably stand to learn a thing or two from Lamas, though we find something about his sort of nerdy voice to be a complete turn-on.

We first discovered this video of Australian muscle bear Trent Fosters about a year ago. We were stuck at our parent's house without a working computer and desperately trying to find masturbation worthy material on our iPhones when we stumbled across this fur-covered deity. Since then we've been pleased to find that Fosters has gotten some work in porn, filming an incredible scene for Straight Guys 4 Gay Eyes.

Not every muscle stud is Gorilla-sized, though. This comparatively twinky hotty manages to inspire our drooling admiration with sheer definition.

Like Alain, Frank Defeo is another muscle stud whose managed to launch a career thanks to his amateur solo videos.

Legend has it that laying hands upon the holy muscle has caused the blind to regain sight, the sick to be healed, the gay to become incredibly aroused.

Bodybuilding nerds are our favorite. We hope he never takes the glasses off.

We love that this muscle worship clip tries to masquerade as a Serious Bodybuilding Video with the smooth sounds of Sade playing in the background. Sorry, Sade automatically makes everything erotic. You could play this song over a documentary about the friggin' Dalai Lama and even his holiness would start to look kind of sexy.