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You can go ahead and file this under "Literally My Goddamn Type!" YUM. Happy New Year everyone!!!

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The greatest present of all this Christmas season is this insanely freakishly disturbingly gorgeous bulge selfie-er that I definitely would let stretch the hell out of my blown out stocking. Hope everyone had a great gross Christmas!

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International photographer sensation Paul Freeman is the mastermind behind THOSE pics of dick-wetting Australian Brandy Martignago, but today we're here to check out another one of his Down Under muses, Karlose James! And let me just say, this guy is literally my husband. I know my husbands are piling up on here and you may think of me as somewhat of a hoarder, but I'm willing to do some serious paring down if it means James can join my Big Love-style celebrity fuck family! This is pretty much the manliest man man man around and is positively covered in delish fuzz that continues all the way to his intact pubes. There is a God! A pube God at that. 

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I think we found him. 

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First off, get in the spirit of this post by listening to Land Down Under, because this really needs to be an immersive sensory experience. Picture it. You're in the Outback, koalas and spiders as far as the eye can see, when all of a sudden, you spot insanely gorgeous Australian model Brandy Martignago hanging out with his huge fat uncut cock and au naturale bush on full display! I'd cum on that land down under. Rite ladies!

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Nick Jonas All Kinds Of Fuckable At Women Of The Year Event Nick jonas af7d4c8f featured


Sassy starlet Nick Jonas will always be our Woman of the Year, so it makes sense that last night he headed to the Glamour Women of the Year Awards in New York City, where he looked so highly fuckable that I can't stand it! Jonasty isn't back in full form until he at least goes shirtless - something he hasn't done in forty-five decades - but this hint of chest hair visible over a shiny gay club shirt and Steve Harvey funeral suit is just doing it for me.

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Here's the insanely gorgeous owner of a dick pic the fake news previously reported as belonging to Shawn Mendes. I don't know which insanely fuckable toned twink is hotter - Shawn Mendes or this Alex Cohen! Thoughts?

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Do you want to cover this Samoa...n with your nutty drizzle? Nope, abort mission. 

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Seduction, by Dolce & Cumonya

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Who would have thought this guy was pube central?

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He then dips his fingers into his tadpole pool...

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Ohhhh that belly hair. 

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Twink Blows Load Out Of Fat Curved Cock, Shows Bubble Butt Screen shot 2016 08 29 at 4.27.46 pm featured


You can't really ask for much more than this sexy young thing working his delish dong before flashing a serious shelf of an ass.

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This disgustingly beautiful boy gives Ryan Gosling a run for his money, especially when he chews on his own wad!

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This stunning guy puts his pretty face to work on a dick while in a car. Oh, and he spits the wad that he earned back onto his dick de jour. Basically, yumzzz.

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