Couple Alert! Sexy AF Style Icons Joe And Nick Jonasty Stun On Red Carpet Nick jonas joe jonas b452b850 featured


Nick Jonasty showed up to the premiere of his flick Jumanji with a plus one in the form of brother Joe Jonas, and the two basically stole the whole damn show with their come-hither glances and styled as fuck looks! Sorry Kevin, you're officially canceled. Nick's pants are so damn tight and his thighs are so damn huge that it looks like he's walking around on two upside-down triangles and it's my new jamity jam jam! Of course his hair is as dreamy as ever and he just can't stop licking those luscious lips, and basically my moisture level is about to call for some Monistat.

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Nick Jonas Styled. As. God. Damn. Fuck! Nick jonas 16197914 featured


I'm honestly afraid to look down now because A) The knowledge that I used a Sharpie to fill in a divot in my Nikes will make me weep after seeing this outfit and B) I'll realize that I'm waist-deep in about twelve different liquids that spewed out of my body thanks to Nick!

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Jesus Help My Pussy, This K.J. Apa Picture Is Literally Too Much K j apa sexy shirtless b5f3a176 featured


After all these years, I finally accepted Jesus into my hole just in time to have him save my poor ailing pussy after seeing this insanely freakishly scarily disturbingly hot picture of Ginger creamboat to the stars K.J. Apa! We already took a look at this shoot for GQ Australia, but somehow this retro jocky vision above is just now coming into my life. I mean guys. This is straight up son of Don Draper meeting me after the pep rally to let out all of his confusing feelings on my no no, and I'm in love!

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Freaking Adorable Gregg Sulkin Does It Doggie Style (GALLERY) Gregg sulkin 09345416 featured


So not to be crass, but I've been doing backstrokes in my own pussy juice all damn day after seeing these insanely cute pics of sassy starlet Gregg Sulkin cuddling up to a bunch of puppies! This is one of the few times that one of our fame ho Insta hotties is post-worthy without being shirtless, or showing his dick, and it's all because there's something about seeing a boy surrounded by cute dogs that really helps me picture our life together. I'm ready Gregg. I'm ready to have your babies! Even though I'll obviously get herpes and HPV through the Bella Thorne connection. Worth it! 

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Nick Jonas All Kinds Of Fuckable At Women Of The Year Event Nick jonas af7d4c8f featured


Sassy starlet Nick Jonas will always be our Woman of the Year, so it makes sense that last night he headed to the Glamour Women of the Year Awards in New York City, where he looked so highly fuckable that I can't stand it! Jonasty isn't back in full form until he at least goes shirtless - something he hasn't done in forty-five decades - but this hint of chest hair visible over a shiny gay club shirt and Steve Harvey funeral suit is just doing it for me.

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Oh So This Is The Gorgeous Nude Dick Pic Guy People Thought Was Shawn Mendes Hot twink dick pics 629599c8 featured


Here's the insanely gorgeous owner of a dick pic the fake news previously reported as belonging to Shawn Mendes. I don't know which insanely fuckable toned twink is hotter - Shawn Mendes or this Alex Cohen! Thoughts?

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Fucking Goddamn Gorgeous Dick Pic Army Boy Amateur 477c5f09 featured


Perfect. Well, almost perfect. Who can spot what's missing?

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Friday Night Lights Fantasy Pretty Penis And Dirty Talk Amateur gay porn 13bfa3fb featured


You had me at "Come suck this dick till I cum." Nice to feel like a lady every now and then. 

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Ansel Elgort Shirtless Instagram Kills Blogger's Butthole Ansel elgort sexy f94ada9c featured


Here's a hot tip: Don't jack off for three days. Sit sidesaddle during Baby Driver and stare at Ansel Elgort while gently rocking back and forth on the theater seat. Go home and explode so much that you drown in your own jizz. So how was everybody's Fourth?!

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Adorable Face, Perfect Junk - Is This What Love Feels Like? Screen shot 2017 06 30 at 4 44 37 pm 9da43442 featured


And don't forget about that bush!

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I hope you brought your appetite. 

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Thank Gawd, Nick Jonas Casual Gay Kiss On Kingdom! Nick jonas sexy fa813e60 featured


...but now the dry spell is over, and mama needs to lay down a tarp.

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This Stunning Face Craves The Thickest Load You've Seen Hot amateur blow job a4183091 featured


Have you ever accidentally put too much flour in your cake batter? Well...

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Name Which Celebrity This Gorgeous Splooger Looks Like From The Side Screen shot 2017 05 17 at 3 16 02 pm c851ecbb featured


The first celebrity that comes to mind. Go. If we get the same one I will shit a brick. 

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18-Year-Old Elijah Naked For Your Pleasure Sexy amateur gay porn ba75f642 featured


Okay, the bedspreads and carpets don't match up in the different pictures. He is a prostitute. Yes!

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