Ask Chad Love & Dating: Dicked Down Bottoms, Politics, & Cheap BFs

Ask Chad Love & Dating: Dicked Down Bottoms, Politics, & Cheap BFs

Well, we are just about through another week. Where did this month go? August seemed to hang on forever but this month just zipped by. So many men in the blink of an eye. LOL. How has everyone’s dating been going? I haven’t had much luck in the dating arena but there have been plenty of hookups. I’m not complaining but sometimes an actual date can be nice. If you are single and have a high credit score, hit me up. Hahahaha!

Keep those questions coming in, Sexy Bitches, I love reading them! Just like my Sniffies profile says, nothing is off limits: [email protected]

Dear Chad,

There’s a new guy I am hooking up with. He’s very hot, has a huge dick and the sex is really good, he dicks me down so good. I mean REALLY good. Here’s the thing, he keeps wanting to hang out. Like right after sex, or he’ll invite me out and I keep making excuses, but I just don’t like him enough to hang out. To be honest, he doesn’t have the best personality and we just don’t click in that way. I feel bad when I keep saying no, but sex is the only thing I like with him. He asks me if I’m dating anyone and I tell him I’m just not looking for that right now, which is somewhat true but I do know that he is not someone I would date. Am I being a dick? Should I just stop sleeping with him? Help!

Dicked Down

Dear Dicked Down,

Oh man, it really does suck when the sex is so great but that’s all there is. Just because you are letting him in your ass doesn’t mean you need to let him in your life. You don’t have to be a dick about it. Just be honest with him and tell him that you really enjoy your time in the bedroom, but that’s all you are looking for. You don’t need to make excuses, just tell him how it is. Obviously, he is looking for something like a dating relationship, just let him down easy. If he can’t accept that or can’t separate the sex and a friendship, then you need to count your losses and let him go. You can play with his dick, just don’t play with his heart. And that doesn't make you a jerk, sometimes you just can’t get into certain guys. But being open and honest about it is how you should approach it.

_____

Hey Chad,

Obviously, this election has everyone in a tizzy. You would have to be an idiot to be gay and vote for the Orange dude. Well, my bestie is that idiot. We have never agreed on politics ever, and in fact, that stopped us from dating at first. We agreed to just have a friendship, and have been besties for twelve years. We avoid talking about current events as it relates to politics, but this election I couldn’t help but bring it up and he floored me when he said he is still voting Republican. He tried defending his stance on the whole thing and it got me so mad I literally had to stand up and leave. We haven’t talked about it since, but it weighs heavily on my mind. I just can’t believe he would be so stupid. Can I have a friendship with him?

Hairy for Harris

Dear Hairy for Harris,

First of all, I love your pen name. Hairy for Harris? Kamala should definitely add that to her campaign platform. LOL. Secondly, this is a tough situation. I have family members, close family members, that are voting Republican this election. This is probably the most contentious and dangerous election for the gay community ever. We know how the other side feels about the queer community and what is at a very high risk depending on the outcome. This election isn’t just about economics or politics, it is about human rights and equality. Has there ever been such an open oppressor towards the queer community? Not only is he dangerous, but his words and actions have given a whole population permission to be hateful towards us. So, understandably, it is almost impossible to believe a member of our community would vote a certain way. That being said, no debate or facts that you present to your friend will dissuade him and his vote. If, at this point, he can’t see the harm of his vote, he never will. You need to decide if the friendship is worth more than politics. I’m having a hard time deciding if I want to share a Thanksgiving table with family members voting against my rights. See what this election is doing? So ugly. Here’s the thing, everything that happens in our community politically is going to weigh on your mind when dealing with your bestie. Is that going to be too much for you? You have been friends for 12 years, that is saying a lot. You probably should have a deep conversation and tell him how you feel. Based on how that convo goes, maybe you can determine which direction you can go. Just be clear, that talking to him is not going to change his mind, but how you can change your mind on how you deal with the friendship.

_____

Dear Chad,

My boyfriend is super cheap. Like really cheap. He has a good job and earns a lot of money, but dating him for the past three years has been really hard because I get embarrassed by his cheap behavior at dinner and even with hanging out with our friends. He is the worst tipper, never buys a round of drinks, and will split hairs over a few bucks on a shared table bill. Also, he cuts his own hair and wears the same clothes over and over because he doesn’t want to spend the money. Don’t even get me started on the kinds of presents he gives me for my birthday and Christmas. Cheap and terrible. A pair of socks? But I do love him overall, and I see a long future with him, but this just gets on my last nerve!

Cheap Chad

Dear Cheap Chad,

Lordy, please don’t tell me his name is Chad. LOL. Dating someone who is cheap is so exhausting and I just won’t do it anymore. I enjoy a certain lifestyle where you can indulge from time to time and not worry about every little dime. Why bother being so stingy when there’s life to enjoy? Here’s the thing, he is never going to change. Maybe he didn’t have money growing up and that’s why he is stingy. Have you asked him about it? Just like with the guy up above, you need to decide what matters most, staying in the relationship and getting over it, or walking away. I had to walk away from a stingy guy because it just made me too upset and I couldn’t enjoy dating and living my life with that kind of energy and restriction. It was too much. Unless you want a life of crappy Christmas presents and waiters giving you the side-eye, you may have to move on to someone who better fulfills your needs and matches your view on living life. Better make the decision now before you spend year after year being frustrated.