The Amazing Insane World of the Hands-Free Cumshot

They are the few and the proud. No, we're not talking about Marines, we're talking about the blessed freaks who are able to blow a load without even touching their penis. Maybe this video will unlock your secrets.

According to this video by HandsFreeLover, the way to masturbate without dirtying your fingers involves having wonderful abs and a huge dick that you tie in various and sundry bondage positions. Then you robe off the balls, then you mutter some magic words to call up the spirits of all the dead porn stars in the universe, and then voila, you're spilling your seed without soiling your fingers. See, children, it's as easy as 1, 2, 3. Well, that's if you're counting in a dead, arcane language that only 12 people on the globe understand. Yup, totally easy.

·Handsfree Rope Cum (xtube.com)