Gay First Dates: Here’s Who’s Paying the Bill

October 1, 2024
ALEXANDER

Gay First Dates: Here's Who's Paying the Bill

Gay first dates over dinner. Do gay men still go on dates? Lol. Yes, some of us do. You put on your tightest, nicest shirt and head out to a nice place for dinner. Over the course of the meal, your date orders more and more and puts more than his fair share of drinks down. You eat salad and have ice water in case you are bottoming later. Then the bill comes. First of all, who does the waiter know who to leave it with? So they leave it right in the middle. There's that awkward moment where you glance at the bill, he glances at the bill, and then there's a silence. Who reaches for it first? Who should be paying? Who asked who out in the first place?

DatingAdvice.com conducted a survey of over 950 people across the US. Tradition has always been that the man pays for the bill, but that doesn't quite work when it's two gay men. Then tradition would dictate that whomever asked who should pay the bill. With younger generations flooding the dating scene, and with changes in social norms and the economy, more and more are learning toward splitting the bill. The survey revealed that 48% of the LGBTQ+ community split the bill on dates. 60% of the Americans surveyed say that they don't expect someone to pay for them.

The survey also revealed the a lot of second dates didn't happen because of the way the bill was handled. Lord knows we don't care for a cheap gay or a bad tipper. 30% revealed that their dates were terrible tippers. Red flag! Splitting the bill right off the bat can help alleviate any awkward moments and can also alleviate the pressure to put out just because someone paid for you.

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But how do you split the bill? 54% said to split the bill evenly, with the remaining 46% saying to split it according to what they ate and drank. We've been on many dates, and even Sunday brunch with friends, where we end up paying more than what we should because someone ordered too many drinks. 34% of those surveyed say that first dates always hit above their intended budget, and $100 per person for a first date is seen as too much.

The best thing you can do is just set expectations early. If a sugar daddy wants to treat you to the Ritz, fine, just know there are probably expectations. Dating a struggling artist? Be mindful of where you choose your dates. If you pay for the first date, make sure he pays for the second date or you'll set a precedent and always be reaching for your wallet. Are you short on cash and get asked out to a fancy restaurant? Tell them there's a new (cheaper) place you've always wanted to try. Just communicate how you want to handle the bill. No one likes someone who nickels and dimes everything, but you always don't want to end up in the poorhouse trying to impress someone you may or may not be seeing for a second date. Also, we've always subscribed to making your first date down to earth and something you would normally do on a regular basis. If you don't get all dressed up and head to a five-star restaurant on a regular basis, why try and be something you are not? If some hot stud offered Netflix and Panda Express, we'd be equally happy.