The Ins and Outs of Micro-Cheating

June 23, 2024
ALEXANDER

The Ins and Outs of Micro-Cheating

There's a term that has been hitting the dating and romance scene - micro-cheating. Very simply put, micro-cheating refers to those small hiccups of trust in a relationship that don't pass the threshold into a physical affair. Seemingly harmless, micro-cheating is still a form of cheating and can lead to bigger implications or even an actual affair. Micro-cheating at any level centers on being dishonest and maintaining a level of secrecy from your partner.

So what exactly makes us micro-cheating? In some cases, you may be engaging in this behavior without fully realizing it. Has one of your friends or colleagues started texting you sexy memes or even adding eggplant emojis? Texting someone in any provocative or flirting way is considered micro-cheating. Have you ever lied about your relationships? Forgotten your wedding ring at home? Said you were just dating when you have lived with your partner for years? Boom. Yep, that's cheating! And we all know keeping your Grindr profile is a big no-no, keeping a dating profile undeleted on Match.com or Hinge is an even bigger red flag. Are you just waiting for the next best thing? Keeping your options for what? Girllll...Do you delay coming home sometimes to go out with attractive co-workers for happy hour? Do you dress up special at work when you know someone hot is coming into the office? Did you give that hot co-worker your number just in case he needs it? Are you constantly looking up your ex's or a new crush's social media? Are you liking and commenting on hot guys' Instagram posts? Boom...you're micro-cheating.

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Most of micro-cheating happens online, at work, or in social circles away from your partner. You may not know you are flirting in your hiking group, and why isn't your S.O. invited? Is your partner engaging in cheating? If they are constantly turning their phone over, taking calls outside, laughing at their phone screen and not telling you what it's about could be some red flags. If they are suddenly acting withdrawn or distracted, that could also be a sign. If they amp up their gym routine and change up their wardrobe, that's either a life meltdown or a sign that someone new has caught their fancy. If all of a sudden, they are spending less and less time at home or not as available for date night, there could be some issues there.

Suspecting your partner of micro-cheating or even realizing you are micro-cheating can be upsetting, obviously. In some cases, the cheating party will get super defensive and angry. In other cases, you may be overreacting and there's a reasonable explanation for changes in behavior. It's all about communication. Noticing signs of such cheating can be dealt with, especially early on. If you have a closed relationship, set some boundaries and expectations. Letting things go and ignoring red flags can only lead to upset and resentment. Therapy should always be on the table, either for yourself or you and your partner. Some guys are just addicted to the attention they get from micro-cheating. Figure out why and work through it.