Ask Chad Love and Dating: Flakey Fisters, Nudy Bootys, & Timid Tims

Ask Chad Love and Dating: Flakey Fisters, Nudy Bootys, & Timid Tims

Hey Girls Hey! How is everyone’s Pride Month going so far? I’ve had more glitter up my ass than a clown during a fiesta. The parties have been going well, the hookups have been fun, and I’m not done showing my Pride! I don’t know if it’s the Pride season keeping you all crazy, but some of the submissions we got this week were fire!

Keep those questions coming in, Sexy Bitches, I love reading them! Just like my Sniffies profile says, nothing is off limits: [email protected]

Dear Chad,

I recently started dating a guy who is into fisting. I had never “fist topped” before but played it off as though I had. Well, it’s been just over a month, and, at his enthusiastic request, I have my hand in him almost every weekend. The truth is, I find it to be so dull and have grown to really not look forward to playing puppeteer, but I feel like I’m in too deep (no pun intended) at this point. What’s a guy have to do to get just one night of good ol’ vanilla butt sex? How do I breach the topic?

Flakey Fister

Dear Flakey Fister,

Gurl, I have tried to get into the world of fisting. I hear you, Sistah. It just isn’t my thing. That being said, it seems your guy is really really into it. We all have our personal kinks and fetishes. Being able to explore them with someone can be very exciting and build a strong bond. But kinks and fetishes are like a spice you sprinkle on to other foods, not the main course. You should be having other kinds of sex, too, especially if that’s what you are into. Feeling obligated to do something in the bedroom is not fun, BUT, sometimes we have to grin and bear it because that’s what our partner is into. Sounds like you want to keep dating this guy, if it isn’t your fist up there it may be someone else’s. Are you ok with that? Once a week isn’t that really much of a demand. I had a boyfriend who didn’t like to give blowjobs but he would do it because I loved it. Sometimes relationships have to compromise a few things. Just be honest with him and throw in a fist session for a session of something you like to do, that’s only fair. Or let him go run his fisting fantasies with someone else and then come home to you. But that can be risky, do you want him "dating" someone else?. There is some sort of flattery that he feels comfortable enough to not only share his kinks but allows to be entered in such a full way with you at the helm.

_____

Hey Chad,

I’m talking to this guy. We’ve reached the texting stage — good morning, good night, etc. But it hasn’t turned horny yet and we haven’t had a proper hang without other people around. I feel like I’m waiting for him to make a move and maybe he’s waiting for me. I don’t know. What do I do to put this car in drive and have at him already?

Timid Tim

Dear Timid Tim,

Get some balls! What the fuck are you waiting for? There are a million things my fingers would rather be doing than mindless texting going nowhere. If you are saying good morning and good night to this person, there is obviously some chemistry and desire there. Life is way too short to be beating around the bush. Invite him out, just you and him, or make your texts a bit racier. I can’t stand wimpy gays who play coy. Unzip and unload, the clock’s ticking! And if he doesn’t feel that way, MOVE ON.

_____

Dear Chad,

I’ve become obsessed with going to naked gay resorts this summer. I’ll spend a whole day naked and cruising and playing. But how often is too often? I’m trying to stick to once or twice a week but it’s hard not to go every day

Nudy Booty  

Dear Nudy Booty,

First of all, what kind of job do you have that you can go so often? I want that one! Second of all, I know that day passes can get pricey, again…what is your job??? LOL. Let’s dive in. First, you need to figure out what you are so attracted to in going. Is it being nude and feeling carefree? Is it that you are hooking up and like the sex? Is it the naughtiness of it all?  Figure out what is the main attraction and see how you can add those elements to your everyday life. Going to a nude resort is no crime, but wanting to go every day is a bit much. It’s like chocolate cake, it might be totally decadent and delicious, but you don’t want it at every meal or it will lose its appeal and then who knows where you will go from there? You also have to make sure, just like watching too much porn, that it is not interfering with your actual life. I was joking, but if you are calling out sick to go to these nude resorts or you have to put it on a new credit card in order to go, it might be time to curtail it back. Is this an addiction or just a really fun hobby? You have to figure that out or chat about it with your therapist. Is this just a stop gap to keep you from actually dating? In any case, invite me next time! I’m the perfect wingman!

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