Grindr Fails: Dom Tops, Pokemon, & Straight Guys!

June 11, 2024
ALEXANDER

Grindr Fails:

It's that favorite time of the week again! More Grindr Fails! Y'all are crazy this Pride Month. So much hookup potential but there are even more crazies out there filling up our mailbox with fun hookup app fails. Is reading Grindr Fails more fun than actually hooking up? Hmmm....! Here are some of our faves from this week.

Talk about the man of your dreams...but the man of your nightmares? We aren't so sure this is a valid excuse. If the D was really good, it's worth the nightmare. We also take issue with sending three separate messages as a no rather than just one meaty message. We don't need all those Grindr notifications taking room from other suitors.

OK, this is a new one for us. We all know that there are plenty of "straight" guys on Grindr. They can't host, they can't send face pics, they won't kiss. Hopefully, especially during Pride Month, the straights can see how much benefit the gays have to offer. We can teach your boyfriend how to be better in bed! LOL.

Ouch. This one hits home. There are so many couples out there having the time of their lives with threesomes or more. We can't even get date #2! Sigh.

There's catfishing and then there's age fishing. True, he did send a real pic of himself. But 1973? That's hot. We also love how the recipient thought it was a vintage filter. Before we say no, we need to know the credit score and asset portfolio of the older guy. If he's close to the grave, we'd love to be in the will!

Ok, this pickup line is SMOOTH! Grindr gay nerds just wet themselves. First of all, there's some gay innuendo with the term Pokemon. Poke me man. But then to expand that to other characters? Genius. We'd give him a rhyd just for that witty and direct message.

Ok, this one warmed our hearts. We just did an article about lasting longer in the bedroom. We aren't going to lie, we do get disappointed when we do all that prep work and then the hookup is done in a matter of seconds. Should we take it as a compliment? Still, this bottom is sweet. But, will he go back for round 2 and hope for a longer outcome?