Single on Valentine’s Day? I Got You!

February 9, 2024
CHAD

Single on Valentine's Day?

Hey Sexies!

We all know Valentine's Day is on its way and with that comes all the nauseating couples commercials, rom-coms, flowers and chocolates, and couples holding hands. While I engage in a little PDA, I'd rather be holding something else. Anywhooo, this year around I am single. Blame it on dating two guys at once but forgetting to tell them about each other. My bad! So with all the date advice tips out there for couples, this round is dating on Valentine's Day advice for singles! Here's some things you can do to have a killer date night for one!

Movie Night:

Yeah, I know that movie nights are typically date filled and on V-day you'll probably see a lot of couples out there. But here's the thing, no one can see you cry in the dark. LOL, Jk. Instead of seeing a rom-com, check out that horror film you were too scared to see, go see an action film where there's nothing but sweaty guys doing sexy things, or see that movie you're too embarrassed to let people know you want to see. Anything but a rom-com. Just get out of the house and escape for a while, go see a double feature while you're at it. Also, surround yourself with a movie buffet. Who needs a guy to hold hands with at the movies when you can be holding hands with a large tub of popcorn with M&Ms poured in it (just try it), a nacho plate, a large pretzel, a bag of Skittles, and an extra-large soda. There are no calories on Valentine's Day. Here's the beauty, you don't have to share any of it.

Singles Party:

Want to be more social? Invite all of your single friends over, or out somewhere, and congregate and party the night away. Who cares that it's a work night? Misery loves company, but turn that misery into gay frivolity. Start at happy hour and go until the sun comes up. Recount your worst dating experiences, your sex tips, bad exes, or just bond over vodka and dancing. Who knows? It might end up being a gay orgy...so only invite your sexy friends.

Grind the Night Away:

So the best part about a Valentine's Day date is usually the sex, am I right? So skip to that part. Be adventurous. Set up your place to host, music, lighting, lube, poppers, and fresh sheets, and hit the hookup apps. There will be plenty of other guys online looking to drown their sorrows in someone's crotch, might as well let it be yours. Have fun with it, try someone you might not usually go for. Can't host? My favorite is to get a hotel room and get a little naughty. Just be responsible!

Beauty Night:

Don't want to go out or deal with other people? Spend the evening at home doing some major self-care. Do a beauty mask, take a long hot bath, put on some cucumber under the eyes and listen to some Enya, or shave that body part you've always wanted to get smooth, die your bear hair back to your youthful color, reshape your eyebrows, pluck your nose hair, clip those nails...do the whole routine and get to bed early.

Porn Night:

If you're gonna be by yourself, enjoy your body by yourself. Why not engage in a little porn marathon? Line up those videos one by one, get a huge bottle of lube and Kleenex, and go to town. Turn the volume up, try edging yourself into oblivion, and just have fun. Try watching some porn that you don't usually watch. Let's see how many rounds you can go. Your dick will thank you and you'll be so exhausted you'll pass out with visions of orgies in your head.

Get Out of Town:

If you are really depressed this Valentine's Day and don't want to be reminded of anything, pack up an overnight bag and head out of town. Go somewhere fun that you can get to in one day. Go explore the city, find the local gay bar, get on the apps, eat somewhere new, just go explore and forget the troubles of your home city.

Go Shop:

Pamper yourself. You saved money by not having to buy some other guy gifts, so spend it on yourself! Buy a new outfit, buy a nice piece of jewelry, buy some hot new undies, cologne (why doesn't anyone wear cologne any more?), some new shoes, something! Just spend it on yourself.

Work It Out:

Ok, I know this doesn't sound like fun to most, but trust me. Go to your gym (find out on Sniffies where the most crowded one is), turn on your music, and just lose yourself in the cardio and weight lifting. It will boost your endorphins, you'll get a good sweat, and you'll feel like a rockstar. And, who knows? You may turn the workout into a bedroom workout depending on who is next to you in the treadmill.

All in all, do whatever makes you happy but don't just sit and wallow in your singleness. The actual St. Valentine was a martyr, you don't have to be one. Another word of advice, just stay off social media. You'll be seeing your ex, all the couples, and all the schmaltz out there.