F*cking With AJ Sloan: Why Gays Desire Daddies

December 22, 2023
AJ SLOAN

AJ's Daddies of XXX-Mas Past, Present, and Future...

I recently was surfboarding some daddy-D like I was afraid of sharks, and it must have been a minute since the last time I experienced the joys of mature man-meat. The salt and pepper chest hair, the comfort of knowing that they’ve experienced so much more and still want to share an experience with you, and the book collection that requires more than two shelves. Like a hot toddy, I don’t have the impulse to have one every day but they are definitely good for the heart & hole. There is a reason that the word “Daddy” is more often than not preceded by an enthusiastic “YES.”

The word "daddy" will have any kinder-queer's five chest hairs and two pubes peaked at full attention as they envision an older and likely more dominant dude that has it all. Daddy culture usually also infers the role of a nurturing or protective partner. From Anderson Cooper to Idris Elba, some men simply exude that daddy energy we all get wet for. We just want them to take us out for frozen yogurt before filling us with their own.

When discussing this topic, the term “daddy issues” will likely come up, implying less than savory emotional challenges stemming from a person’s relationship with their bio-daddy aka actual father aka mom's baby daddy (calm down, Gaycest). In the context of attraction to daddies in gay culture, some dudes might be drawn to older or more paternal figures due to a desire for guidance, stability, or nurturing that they may feel they lacked in their more formative years. Although this may be true for some, this is not the motivation for all daddy-chasers or those who find themselves booed up with a guy who the waitstaff always assumes is their uncle.

The psychological appeals of daddies are as diverse as the many folks who find them attractive. Some individuals may be drawn to older or more mature partners due to a perceived sense of stability, intellect, or a mentoring dynamic while others are drawn to that self-assurance and self-awareness that (hopefully) develops with age. The power dynamic inherent in age-differentiated relationships might also appeal to so, so many. It is, at the same time, important to remember that preferences and motivations will always vary widely among people, and there isn’t a “one-daddy-fits-all” explanation.

Media plays arguably one of the most significant roles in influencing cultural norms. Television shows, movies, and (gay gasp…) porn (...shocker!) have depicted such relationships (yes you, Nasty Daddy), contributing to a broader awareness and, to some extent, normalization of daddy dynamics. While media undoubtedly adds to the visibility of daddy appreciation and sexualization, there are of course broader cultural attitudes and ever-evolving societal norms that play their part.

When I was freshly 18, I found myself in what I can now call a poly daddy-son relationship. He was a lawyer, professor, and total f*cking babe with a bomb-ass dick and a hurricane tongue. I was a happy-go-lucky little homo having what I thought was good sex but, looking back, I now can see it for what it was: phenomenally Olympic-level, eyes rolling back into your head exorcist style, body-convulsing, no-poppers-necessary-but-I-mean-if-they-are-there-why-not, gimme gimme more gimme gimme more, delicious and addictive f*ck sessions. The goddam memories…

It wasn’t just the sex that had me snail-trailing to his bedroom multiple nights a week. He opened me up (shut up) to so many aspects of gay culture that I most likely would have eventually experienced over the next decade but, I mean, why wait if you don’t have to? Aside from the whole Brian/Justin dynamic, he looked out for me in a way that a younger dude likely couldn’t have. In and out of the bedroom, dressed and undressed, I was fortunate to have had that relationship. Pay it forward? Too soon, skanks. Until then, find out for yourself which daddy with dynamite dick satisfied my sweet tooth and then some, the true inspiration for this read...

Attraction is complex and, like every story, influenced by each individual's personal experience. Ultimately, there are countless factors to the sex appeal of older men and everyone has their own preferences at the end of the day. In need of a daddy yourself tonight? Browse the menu over at Daddy Hunt or try the app. On that note, I’ll close with probably my favorite Gaga quote:

“There can be a thousand daddies in a room… and it only takes one 'me' to suck every last of their cocks.” - Not Gaga.

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Photos courtesy of MTPK Photography.