Ask Chad: Facials, Grindr Popularity, and Bored Boyfriends…Oh My!

October 22, 2023
CHAD

Hey Girl Hey!

It’s your favorite Mean Ghoul here. As any good gay does, I’m starving myself to fit into my Halloween costume. I’ll just be in a speedo (as usual), I just need to figure out the rest of my costume. Something that won’t get in the way while I’m tricking. And treating. Everyone seems to be in the Halloween spirit this year, and I love it. It truly is my favorite holiday. When else can you dress like a slut in public? Let’s do it!

Anywayyyy, keep those questions coming in, Sexies. It keeps me entertained to find out all of us bitches have the same crazy lives and sex trouble. As my Sniffies profile says, Nothing is off limits: [email protected]

Dear Chad,

My boyfriend has gotten into a new trend of only wanting to cum all over my face and call me a slut. It was hot at first, but now it’s every time. I just want to take his load the old-fashioned way. I feel like he’s working out some aggression on me.

Thanks,

Facial

Dear Facial,

HOT! Personally, I love getting a hot facial and being called a slut. It’s soooo hot! Butt, pardon the pun, I also can see how every time that might get old. My butt would get jealous without getting loads all up in there. Next time he pulls out and hovers over you, just turn around and literally put it back in your butt and play dom with him, and call him a slut and tell him to load your hole. Make it hot, make it dirty. If he still insists on cumming on your face, maybe there is a bigger issue. Maybe it’s time to break up. Give him my number, I need some good moisturizing.

_____

Dear Chad,

My partner and I have gotten into a rut. We used to go out to the clubs, go out to dinner, hang out with friends. Now, every day after work, we make dinner, eat it, then watch TV…EVERY NIGHT! I’m getting bored but my boyfriend just doesn’t want to do anything. He says he’s tired from work. Help!

Thanks,

Bored Boyfriend

Dear Bored Boyfriend,

Giiiirrrllll…this boring routine is the first step to not even having sex anymore. You have to keep things active otherwise any relationship will stall. Take the reigns, text him at work and tell him instead of coming home to meet you somewhere. Plan a fun, laid-back, night somewhere. Remind him how fun you can be outside of the house. Be romantic about it. But, if he’s always lethargic, maybe there’s a testosterone issue or something. But don’t let things go stale. You might just have to be the creative one and create date nights. If he still wants to just watch TV cancel the cable. LOL

_____

Hi Chad,

I keep getting recognized on Grindr. Like all my friends and even co-workers laugh at me and say that they saw me on Grindr. It bugs me. Shouldn’t people just mind their own business?

Thanks,

Grindr Guy

Dear Grindr Guy,

Look, everyone fucks, just about everyone is on Grindr or some app of some kind. Nothing to be embarrassed about. If it really bothers you, just crop off your head and in your profile say that you can send a face pic if necessary. Easy peasy. God knows there’s nothing but a slew of torsos on Grindr anyway.