Grindr Fails: Oblivious Gen Z Twinks, Rosebuds, & Clocking A Catfish

October 14, 2023
JORDAN JAYRO

Good morning, Starshine! It’s time for another wonderful edition of Grindr Fails! This is where I forage the internet in search of the wildest Grindr conversations. Then I bring them here and offer my expert opinions and thoughts on them. This week we’ve got a guy who doesn’t know what a DVD is! Is that a deal breaker for you? And what happens when someone catfishes you with a picture of your ex? Are rosebuds romantic? Asking for me. As always there’s never a dull moment online with the gays. So buckle up and enjoy!

Whenever someone on an app like Grindr says they're looking for “romance,” it makes me want to roll my eyes. But I shouldn’t! The truth is that I met my boyfriend of over eight years on Grindr! So it’s not something that never happens! I also tend to assume these guys are in their early 20s. There’s something about a young gay with barely any adult life experience who is “ready to settle down” that makes me cringe. Girl, settle down from what?! Living with your parents?! No way. In this instance, the guy in the yellow is looking for romance, and the guy in the blue is ready to give it to him. But not in the way you might think… It took me a minute to realize what the rose emoji meant. Did you get it? He’s saying he’s going to give him a rosebud. OOP.

I still don’t understand why people use fake pictures! There’s no point! I’ve known people who just looked up people who looked like them and used their pictures. It’s so stupid! In this case, the guy in the blue got caught! I had a similar experience recently, where I sent my friend the pictures a gentleman caller sent me and he was like “Wait! That’s my friend’s boyfriend!” By the time I saw it, the guy was already with me and I couldn’t tell that the picture wasn’t him. He looked just like the guy in the picture! But it ended up being a fake picture, just one that looked a lot like him. So then why not just send your own pictures?! Make it make sense!

I hope you’re sitting down for this one. I can only assume that the guy in the blue chat is younger than the guy in the yellow chat. Is the guy in the yellow elderly? Who doesn’t have Netflix?! He says that he does own a bunch of DVDs though. To which the other guy responds that he doesn’t know what those are and isn’t into that. This whole thing screams middle-aged daddy meets Gen Z twink. I get it though! I went through my daddy phase too when I was fresh out of HS. But I still knew what a DVD was!! These two need to just move on. This isn’t going to work out.

That's all for this week! Come back next week and see what else I find!

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