Hollywood News & Movie Gossip: Wonka, Barney Goes Adult, Hemsworth In Spandex

October 9, 2023
ALEXANDER

I’m your Gay News Guy – this is the news, casual, sassy, unfiltered, and a little tipsy. Ok here’s today’s MOVIE news as I see it!

Dicks: The Musical is out! I have three letters for this movie…WTF? LOL. I had the privilege to attend a screening with the leading stars (even Nathan Lane showed up!) and can honestly say I haven’t laughed that hard in a long time. There is no way to describe the film other than it is a super gay version of South Park. Totally irreverent, has no regard for being politically correct, and is HIGHlarious. Megan Mullaly, Nathan Lane, Bowen Yang, and Megan Thee Stallion with a showstopping number basically being THAT Boss Bitch. The film tells the tale of two men, competing in the business world, who find out they are twins separated by estranged parents Mullaly (a lisping crazy lady whose vagina has left the building…literally) and Nathan Lane (a gay dandy with a penchant for sewer trade). What unfolds is Hollywood fuckery at its finest. Get baked, get tipsy, and GO SEE THIS MOVIE.

Remember cutie Justin Long from all those films in the early 2000s? He’s baaaack! Horror and Christmas come together for It’s A Wonderful Knife…a horror retelling of the famous Jimmy Stewart It’s A Wonderful Life. We are here for this…get out the egg nog!

Chris Hemsworth shirtless and in spandex? Yassss! BUT, don’t get too excited. Hemsworth was supposed to play Hulk Hogan in a biopic for Netflix. Well, Netflix waited too long and no longer has the life rights to Hogan and Hemsworth has seemed to lose steam in doing the project.

The prequel to Charlie and The Chocolate Factory, Wonka, is on its way for a Dec 15^th release. The film is supposed to be dark and received a PG rating for violence. Violence? Is Wonka beating the Oompa Loompas or what? Not sure what to think about this musical film…but I a ready to see Timothée Chalamet stretch those legs in dance numbers.

Love CGI? Well, get out the big spoon for a heaping serving of epic battle scenes in Ridley Scott’s Napoleon starring Joaquin Phoenix. Promising to rival Gladiator, it promises to dazzle! Ridley hasn’t had that great luck with his last few films so let’s hope this rises to the occasion.

Remember when Robert DeNiro was badass and not the grumpy yet loveable grandpa in every film? Well, he’s baaaaacccck! In Scorsese’s upcoming Killers of the Flower Moon (with our forever crush Leo DiCaprio), he’s back to being the villain we all know and love.

Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde gets an update starring Eddie Izzard, who came out as trans, in a gender-bending retelling of the story. Here’s the trailer, thoughts?

Did you know Labyrinth 2 was in the works and that Jennifer Connelly was in talks to return? In development for three years, the production seems to have halted with the script not going anywhere. The original Labyrinth was a box office disappointment but became a cult classic. I remember growing up not being able to get the image of David Bowie’s tight pants out of my mind.

Barney is trying to move in on the success of the Barbie movie with an adult-minded version ready to hit the screen. Adult-minded? What does that mean? Is Barney a drunk after his show got canceled? Is he finally coming out? LOL