Interview With the Vampire’s Hunky (Blood) Suckers Now and Then

Interview With the Vampire will be available to stream October 7th on AMC Plus. 

Pull out those pup ears and matching jock-strap, another witching season is upon us. Is there any better way to ring in this year’s Ghoul Tide than with a new homoerotically charged series featuring our favorite “are they/aren’t they” vampire duo? That’s right folks. Anne Rice’s Interview With the Vampire will be hitting AMC Plus on October 2nd.

Unlike the 1994 Silver screen adaption, the series will not shy away from how oh so very gay this story is. Despite the absence of dude-on-dude tongue action, the film version had no shortage of babes. Let’s take a look at these hotties, shall we? 

1994 Lestat

For those of us who have seen 1994’s Interview With the Vampire, we have all quite possibly seen the gayest version of Tom Cruise. I’m talking permanent knee bruises, guzzling way more than just blood Tom Cruise. Although those hungry lips were only locking to veins above the belt, he definitely brought the gay gay gay tension alive. 

2022 Lestat

Filling the likely designer shoes of the iconic Lestat de Lioncourt will be Sam Reid. You may have seen this daydream from Down Under in 2013’s Belle alongside hardon-inducing Matthew Goode, or the yummy cast of The Riot Club of the same year. With those doughy lips framed by that rock-cut jaw, I’m sure he will be met with little to no resistance when it comes time for him to sink his teeth into his prey. I VOLUNTEER AS TRIBUTE!

1994 Louis

Anybody who knows and loves Brad Pitt will remember his iconic (yes, iconic) performance of Louis de Pointe da Luc. In his pre-daddy days, Pitt gave us sex sex sex in every character he portrayed on screen. I mean, who hasn’t rubbed one out to Fight Club (and has there been a porn version titled Fuck Club)? If all of his characters could just fuck each other in one big meta-orgy… fuck…

2022 Louis

Who has been given the honor to play the arm candy of Vampire Lestat? That would be none other than Jacob Anderson. In the role of Louis, Anderson will be delivering all of the vampy angst and panty-dropping pouty gazes that Sir Brad Pitt tantalized us with over 25 years ago. One of the many alums of Game of Thrones (where he played the lovable Grey Worm), fans of GOT will be dripping with excitement to see Anderson at his finest, portraying a bloodthirsty babe with daddy issues. Bite me harder…

1994 Claudia

And now for the true queen of the ensemble. No need to check the time, it’s bad bitch o’clock. To call her naughty is not even half of it. Found on her death bed, Claudia was made a vampire by Lestat as a gift to Louis. Happy family? Arguable. Pre-Bring It On, Kirstin Dunst brought new meaning to spoiled only child. Dunst had as gagging, and if she asks if you want to see her doll collection, PASS.

2022 Claudia

Roll out the carpet and polish off that tiara, filling the petite pumps of the prepubescent plasma thirsty princess/gayby Claudia will be young actress Bailey Bass. This ferocious little gem hit the ground running with credits under her belt like Law and Order SVU (hot), The Jenkins family Christmas (woof), and the upcoming Avatar project (blue).

In the film version, Kirsten Dunst’s Claudia went from innocent little Goldie Locks to stone cold bitch of a walking baby doll, draining her victims with a giggle. Is Bass up for the challenge? I have a sneaking suspicion that she’ll kill it. Like, the role, kill the roll. No homo(cide), bro.

Holy hellfire, we’ve got a lot to look forward to.  This show’s got everything! Gay vampires, consent, murder, racially diverse depictions of the antebellum American South, the Plague, sexy caskets, tops, bottoms, gentlemen, sluts,  human baby dolls, kissing, biting, long hypnotizing gazes, and a boat!

Get your AMC Plus subscription ready, it’s almost as good as my OnlyFans. Now go blackout at your nearest costume shop. I’ve got some fake blood to defrost and that Buffy cosplay outfit won’t iron itself.

Cybersocket: Plug In. Get Off. Questions? Comments? Email us at [email protected]. Follow us on Twitter and Instagram.