RuPaul’s Drag Race Season 14, Ep. 12 Recap: Moulin Ru: The Rusical & Bosco’s Golden Gal

I’m laughing. No, really. This is fun. We’re having fun now. Aren’t we having fun? *Chuckles heartily to self before abruptly stopping* WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU RUING?! Okay. Let’s get into it. Here’s this week’s…lol…recap of RuPaul's…(*chuckles*) Drag (*sighs defeatedly*) Race.

We open up the episode with Jasmine getting a bit more of her due after last week’s awkward, lonesome exit. She gives a long and personal goodbye, and makes her love alliances clear. And with that, the girls get into the day. DeJa being the cunning little bitch she is takes control of the moment, asking what everyone thinks they’ve learned. Gawd bless Jorgeous’ young, arrogant, hilarious heart for saying she hasn’t learned shit. Mama Ru cums on video… wait…no…she came on video. Ugh. Her video message appeared, okay? The theme became quickly clear and I, being the insufferable theatre homo that I am, was super excited for it: an homage to Baz Luhrmann’s iconic movie and Broadway musical, Moulin Rouge, with her version, Moulin Ru. We love it.

The girls get to work and rather than creating a mini challenge that dictates who gets to pick the roles, picking the characters was the challenge in and of itself. And what a challenge it was. Picking the parts in the musical proved to be more dramatic, and more tough than the last threesome I was in was trying to decide who would be the Lucky Pierre. And let me just tell you… what a Tuesday morning that was for me. A few of the queens jump in quickly to claim roles, as well they should. If I were in the competition this late in the game, I’d be claiming what’s mine and making it clear I’m not here to fuck around. The reality is I wouldn’t make it past that pesky first challenge of every season of Drag Race: casting. Seen here is footage from my actual Drag Race audition tape:

Most dramatic in this Moulin Ru divvying of roles was who would get to play Saltine, the lead of the show within this show. Fitting that two salty crackers both wanted to play the role, with Bosco and Lady Camden going head-to-head. Both stood firm, again, as well they should. At this point in the game, you’ve gotta get what’s yours. Lady Camden suggests a coin toss, and Bosco, much to the delight of (if not the nudging by) the producers, insists on not just a group vote, but a non-anonymous vote! We love it. The girls start jumping in with their votes, and when the dust settles it’s an even split, with only Willow Pill left to vote. This forced Willow to be a bit more publicly cutthroat than she’s inclined to be, but hey…that’s Drag Race, baby. Her vote goes to Bosco, meaning Lady Camden will play Mama Z, who made sure to throw a stern warning Bosco’s way to not fuck it up.

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by RuPaul's Drag Race (@rupaulsdragrace)

A great delight was Leslie Jordan’s guest appearance on this week’s episode. The pandemic's viral sensation and Will & Grace Emmy winner served as the director for (and co-star of) Moulin Ru, with Miguel Zarate as the choreographer, and singer Leland as the composer. Angeria struggles the most with the choreo, whereas Jorgeous struggles in the “personal opinions” department, stupidly saying aloud that she doesn’t like musical theatre. YOUR OPINION IS WRONG, OKAY?! When it came time for the performance, the girls were by and large a delight, a point with which the judges agreed. Willow, OF COURSE, was fucking great, as the famous Green Fairy of absinthe. Even if she didn’t quite hit the “mirror, mirror” theme of this runway, her look was great and she was fucking hilarious. Outside of her initial posturing, we actually don’t get a ton to work with from DeJa this episode, which is neither a good nor bad fact for her; I think she was just overshadowed by a lot of other drama.

A few of my favorite "Mirror Mirror" runway looks were Camden’s, who walked first and rocked a badass Jack Frost-meets-shooting-star outfit. Willow wore fireworks better than I could ever rock jeans, although I actually think it’s one of her less impressive looks in the grand scheme of the season. Perfectly good. Angeria wore a stunning coral blue gown that reminded me of the famous Magic Gardens in Philadelphia and Daya channeled her inner-KISS lewk succeeding in doing far better at what I think Bosco was attempting to do. Her metallic look didn’t quite shine as much as she probably thought it did, and it ended up yet another week of Bosco walking the runway in a bra, corset, and panty.

Mirror mirror on the wall, who’s the fiercest of them all?! #DragRace pic.twitter.com/70AXnvzZtm

— RuPaul's Drag Race (@RuPaulsDragRace) March 26, 2022

The drama just got even more interesting when Ru asked the queens who they thought should go home and all of them said Bosco! Awk. As many pointed out, after all the back-and-forth and all the drama about who would get to play Saltine, Bosco didn’t heed Lady Camden’s warning to not fuck it up, because she…well…fucked it up. She may have had blah material with which to work, but she still could (read: should) have risen to the occasion. It also just sets the fall to be that much worse when put up against the potential of Camden crushing it, which is exactly ended up happening. To quote Camden, “What feels good about this is that I didn’t win the fight with Bosco, and I may not have been the loudest voice in the room, but I turned that shit out, bitch!"

The most dreaded question in herstory… #DragRace pic.twitter.com/VircZsPcyy

— RuPaul's Drag Race (@RuPaulsDragRace) March 26, 2022

Well, the girls got their wish, because Bosco ended up in the bottom two alongside Jorgeous. The two give it their all, but Jorgeous comes through the winner which means Bosco is going home, and FINALLY we have an elimination. Lol, you stupid bitch. You should know better by now. We should all know better by now. This season no one goes home. If it hadn’t been for the week’s of non-eliminations, this next moment would have actually been incredible. I supposed to a degree it still was. When Bosco unwrapped her chocolate bar, we saw the look on her face before we saw the shine of the foil in front of her: GOLD! The long-prophesized Golden Ticket was finally revealed, meaning Bosco would live to see another week. Despite the fact that everyone recommend she get the boot this week, all of the other queens seem genuinely thrilled with the dramatic outcome.

The drag gods have spoken! #DragRace pic.twitter.com/8TRZ00fsHn

— RuPaul's Drag Race (@RuPaulsDragRace) March 26, 2022

This is the ***FIFTH*** week that no one has been eliminated. In a regular season there would ideally be only one week where that happens, but I could accept two because of the Golden Ticket factor. But five? Yo, the producers better shape the fuck up for next season.

Questions? Comments? Email [email protected].