Handjobs, Hooking Up with Roommies, and Catfishes…This Week’s Ask Chad!

Hey Sluts!

How was the week? I can't believe another week has already cum and gone. These rising gas prices are no fucking joke. I know, I know, I'm beating a dead horse but it's really affecting my hookups. No one wants to drive more than 3 miles to fuck. What's a Chad to do?

I did have one hot hookup come over this week. He looked exactly like his pics and I even told him to come over with gray sweatpants...which he did. SWINGING AWAY! But...as things got hot and heavy, I realized he was a LOUD mouth breather. He sounded like fucking Darth Vader. I have such a pet peeve for loud chewers, mouth breathers, and chip crunchers. Even with my head buried in the pillow, I could hear his mouth breathing. Mid fuck I had to ask him to close his mouth. So then he started making snorting noises. Jesus. Does loud mouth breathing bother anyone else? Like, close your damn mouth!

Anywayyyyy, this week's questions got me a little hot and bothered, I'll be honest. Keep sending them in! Nothing is off limits: [email protected]

Here's what you guys were asking...check out my answers!

Dear Chad,

I've been hooking up with my roommate and now he's late on rent every month, and this last month I had to cover him. Is he taking advantage of me?

- Roommate Ronnie

Hey Chad!

I've been chatting with this guy on Tinder but he never wants to FaceTime or meet up in real life. We've been talking for months. I have feelings for him. Am I being catfished?

- Catfished

Dear Chad,

My boyfriend is a masseuse...I have a feeling he is giving happy endings cause he's been bringing in more money. I don't know how I feel about it. Can I ask him?

- Happy Ending Eddie

Makes me want a massage...real bad.

See ya next week, Sluts!