Lately I've had - what's the word for it - a fuckity fuck ton of time on my hands, so naturally this weekend I found myself perusing not only Chasten and Pete's Instagram grids looking for fat-assed pics of my betrothed, but also every fan account I could get my hands on. And ladies. I found some things. The truly sweet and sincere fan account @boot_edge_edge posted an innocent picture of Pete Buttigieg surveying a dumpy Indiana park... but it was his dumpster that I couldn't' take my eyes off of. And he can park it... on my face.
View this post on Instagram
Let's get a little detailed shot up in hur:
Like. Wow. My Bootigieg is definitely experiencing the benefits of stretch denim technology. It was actually this pic that led me to scope out what else is happening in the world of Pete Buttigieg ass news, and while surprisingly Pete and Chasten don't post gratitutious pics of Pete's hairy clinically obese dumper on the reg, I did find one more pic that had my no-no saying yes-yes this weekend.
View this post on Instagram
Let's zoom in again, for research purposes:
Not only is Pete's ass so damn hot in this very real pic, but if that's his actual stomach showing from under his shirt, I will need a moment alone. And it won't be pretty. Sorry if this post was too RaYnDuM but democracy dies in darkness okay! And if you come across any pics of Pete's obese butt, please post them in the comments. America needs to heal.