Well. It finally happened. Sure, we previously saw Riverdale starlet K.J. Apa's butt reflection on an episode of Ellen from the beginning of 2020. But now, thanks to the Michael Bay-produced COVID-19 thriller Songbird, we have K.J. Apa's first real nude scene ever. I'm not crying you are. Seriously! This is a big deal for those of us who first saw Apa shirtless on the set of Riverdale season one in 2016 and thought "Hm, why am I not hating this?"
Songbird takes place in the near future, when the world is battling the out-of-control COVID-23. The real disaster is Songbird's critical reception (currently it has a 12% Tomatometer score on Rotten Tomatoes, with one reviewer noting "Warning: If you are experiencing nausea, headache, fatigue or vomiting, you might have just watched Songbird") but between you me and Dupree, Songbird could have a -1% rating and I wouldn't care. Or a 100% for that matter. Because why? Because we're here for dat ass.
Just twelve minutes into Songbird, J.K. Apa strips out of his clothes to take a sexy outdoor shower. As he cleans himself, he turns away from the camera, giving us a look at his smooth plump wet ass! History. You've been made.
Apa continues to mill around his house shirtless, and even does some pit-forward pullups. Whatever your opinion is on K.J. Apa, you have to admit that he has some of the most primo pits in the game.
Songbird is available to stream for $19.99 on Amazon Prime and Google Play. Will you be tuning in? It's funny. I make fun of K.J. Apa for being a religious zealot, yet here I am having a religious experience.