See Pete Buttigieg’s Insanely Subtle Bulge In New Pic

December 31, 2019
HIS_EXCELLENCY

We need to be open-eyed (unlike me here) about the challenges facing our country. @PeteButtigieg is running for President (!) because we're running out of time. If you're able, please chip in a few dollars before tomorrow night by clicking here https://t.co/KJku117LSY pic.twitter.com/6sMsRLCiwC
— Stephen Brokaw (@ssbrokaw) December 30, 2019

South Bend's snarkiest starlet Pete Buttigieg does an annoyingly good job of keeping his Coke can cock bulge under wraps, but thankfully his thirst bucket political director Stephen Brokaw does not possess that skill. Brokaw tweeted a picture of Buttigieg looking all kinds of zaddilicious while jogging oceanside in some clingy shorts. And what doth lie betwixt those meaty hairy thighs? The very absolute most minuscule subtlest bulge illuminated by the rising sun in herstory!

But it'll do cum pig. It'll do. This is the kind of quality political content I want more of in 2020. We all know that Buttigieg's azz sadly succumbed to the obesity epidemic, but something tells me he has a fat engorged cock as well, and being a true leader means unleashing your big penis for America. Or whatever, they're making me work New Years Day and this is all I have. LUV U BYE.