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Patrick Schwarzenegger doesn't get nearly the recognition he deserves from the Dark Gay Web, but here's the tea mamaw, he's got some tig ol' bitties just ripe for a good motorboating, and he recently flaunted them on the beach where he was hanging out with his tit-loving girlfriend Abby Champion. A champion of boobays! Ugh today is weird.
Anyway the twenty-six-year-old Patrick is an actor, Instagram model, and everything in between, and what I'm genuinely lurving about Pat is that he isn't afraid to step out with his bod looking at least slightly humanoid. He's looking all kinds of fit in these pics, but it's more of a relaxed fit than what you get from most celebs, and ya, I fucking stan!
When I see a guy with 28.5 pack abs and negative 1 body fat, I assume that before leaving the house he diarrheaed his brains out with Instagram herbal tea laxatives, did 300 situps, and cried for an hour. That's not a man! Ya know? Patrick doesn't cry. He just looks down as his massive hairy breasts and says "Owe ya one Jesus."
Photo Credit: MEGA
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