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DaYUM! The Atlantic ocean! #GetThirstTrapped @kimkardashian #reusablestraw #savetheturtles
Not to sound like I've reached the level of delusion that requires medical attention, but... does anyone feel like Nolan Gould reads these disgusting deplorable unholy posts about him on Fleshbot Gay? WHO ELSE is writing about him this much? And WHAT ELSE would prompt him to get as porntastic as he does on Instagram? If you Google "Nolan Gould bulge," "Nolan Gould naked," or "Nolan Gould dick pic" you'll see that we are all up in those search results, so, assuming Nolan's curious as to who he needs to get restraining orders against, there's a good possibility that he's at least come across Fleshbot Gay. And that he's my number one fan.
Are you scared for my safety and the safety of those around me yet? LOL. So ya, this weekend the twenty-year-old Nolan Gould threw down one of his thirstiest traps to date on Instagram, which came just days after he went EPOCHALLY shirtless for the fake digital magazine Prune! With his mini beefy bod and hairy chest, he's looking like the youngest cub in the wild, and his painted toenails let us know that he is down. to. clown. His caption:
DaYUM! The Atlantic ocean! #GetThirstTrapped @kimkardashian #reusablestraw#savetheturtles
also lets us know that he's funny, a friend to the environment, and that he's more than aware of what his shirtless presence does to manties across the globe. ARE YOU READING THIS NOLAN. If so, yikes. I'm so sorry. My real name is, um, Taylor Swift. So get mad at her. I mean me. Taylor.