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Andy Cohen And Anderson Cooper Are “Eskimo Brothers” And I’m Low Key Wet

CELEBRITY

 

Is that an igloo in your pants or are you just happy to fuck me? What. No matter how shitty of a gay friend Andy Cohen was to Kathy Griffin - who’s doing FINE btw - he’s still my zaddy with z, and I’d still rather sit on his zace than Anderson Cooper’s. And zat’s zat about zat!

But we’re not here to talk about the age-old Cohen versus Cooper debate. We’re here to talk about that fact that on Watch What Happens Live, the thirsty for the Gay Gawds Cohen revealed that he and Anderson Cooper are “Eskimo brothers.” “What is an Eskimo brother?” you wonder, hoping it means they’ve snowballed each other’s cum wads but being too demure to ask.

Eskimo brothers are guys who’ve banged the same person, and while this in and of itself isn’t fap-worthy intel, when you really think about the fact that fifty-year-old Andy and fifty-one-year-old Anderson have worn out (they’re tops and I won’t hear otherwise) the same little star-fucking cum dumpster (just going by context clues) it makes you think “What if I was that little star-fucking cum dumpster???” So ya. Do you have an Eskimo brother? Are you the twink who had both Cohen and Cooper inside your colon? Spillz plz and thx?

 


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