Our Beloved “Spartacus” Shows Us Some Dick

If there's one thing we love more than Spartacus and his bulging muscles, it's naked Spartacus painted gold and showing off the goods. Even when he's being pimped out, he's gorgeous.

This week's episode revolved around Spartacus being whored out to elite Roman women. When the cousin of Rome's wealthiest citizen wanted to bed down with Spartacus, Lucretia set it up that they would meet wearing masks and get it on. In preparation they painted Spartacus all gold like a breathing Oscar and sent him out to stud. While he's standing there waiting for his lover, we get to see his limp schlong. Too bad the camera is so far away from him.

However, Lucretia played a trick and switched women on Spartacus so that he fucked his mortal enemy's wife, Ilithyia. When the wealthy lady saw this she laughed and threated to start a scandal so Ilithya killed her by smashing her face into the floor! Yes, there might not have been much gay action in Friday's episode, but there were tons of diva theatrics. They know how to keep the boys rivited to their TV screens.

Below is Spartacus and Ilithyia's sex scene. There are boobs galore, but if we were 15 and had no other porn, we'd totally be jerking off watching Spartacus put his dick inside her.

· "Spartacus" (starz.com)