Movie stars and their lousy Oscars. So overrated! Let's kneel before the quadruple threats on Broadway—those hunks who sing, dance, act and look stunning naked. Plus, for a mere $127, can see them live and in the flesh.
Recently, Time Out New York came out with a toe-tapping list of the 10 Hottest Chorus Boys on Broadway this season. We being the cheap man-hungry sluts we are, we decided to learn more about these guys, and dig up some images of our own. After all, Broadway's one of the last places in New York where you can pay money to see cuties wiggle their tushes for your viewing pleasure.
Anton Harrison LaMon is currently in Phantom of the Opera. He doesn't remove a stitch in that show, but a night with him and we'll be hitting those high notes with our angel of sex.
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Joshua Buscher is in this season's new drag campfest musical, Priscilla Queen of the Desert. It'd be a major drag is this Nordic God doesn't put up a backstage cam in his dressing room for a nightly Live Chat. We'll play queen to this king any night.
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Kenway Kua is currently in Wicked, which is exactly what we'd like to get with him. With those ass-cheeks Defying Gravity, we'll dispense with Glinda's wand and use our own.
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Ward Billeisen can be found shipboard this spring in the Broadway revival of Anything Goes. We're presuming he's playing a sailor, so we'll avoid the obvious "sea" and "men" puns. Historical note: this show contains the hit Cole Porter standard, "You're the Top." Ward, we're anything you want us to be.
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Reed Kelly may currently play a walking corpse in The Addams Family, but the sight of him showering could even make Cousin It's hairs stand on end. When Reed's alone backstage and "in the mood," call on us to play The Thing.
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James Brown III is also in this season's Priscilla Queen of the Desert. His character's name is Jimmy, who we don't recall from the film, so maybe that tight, lithe body won't be covered up in drag. We're very much enjoying seeing this bit of smooth yumminess as a red-blooded male.
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Kyle DesChamps was last seen in Billy Elliot. He's not on Broadway now, so calling all casting directors: Get him back here! Call us for a private audition.
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Spencer Liff of the Baby Face and Killer Pecs stole the show in Cry-Baby a couple years back. Who could forget his pelvic gyrations and sweltering sex appeal? They've certainly burned a hole in my brain! Although he's also not currently on Broadway, there's no doubt we'll be seeing this sinewy sextwink again soon.
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Charlie Williams may be the luckiest chorus boy here. He's starring next to Danny Radcliffe in this spring's How to Succeed In Business Without Really Trying. We're really trying to imagine him without that leg propped up and not succeeding. (Hardy-har-har.) We don't know who we'd rather pull a Freaky Friday with: Charlie to get to move in close to Danny, or Danny to get to make the moves on Charlie!
There are several more extremely sexy photos of Charlie here.
Daniel Robinson is last, but not least. He was in Hairspray for several years and is currently not on Broadway, but certainly keeping busy...as busy as we'd be on that butt. We first saw him as a jaw-dropping sexy football quarterback in 2009's annual Broadway Bares performance. A must see video of which is next...
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This shaky, audience-shot video of Daniel Robinson's part in Broadway Bares 2009 starts off like Blair Witch shot by a horny gay man in a sea of swaying gayness. Skip through to 2:06, when Daniel takes the stage and makes out with two lesser specimens of manhood before ripping off his football pants. He then stirs the gays into a foaming frenzy of lust as he parades his beautiful, jock-framed ass up and down the catwalk before even ripping the jock off. Can some Casting Directors Ten-Hut this hunk back to the stage?