Gay Porn’s Slutty Reality Show Has a Horny Bedside Manner

After weeks of stunty set pieces in laundry rooms and underwater, Episode 8 of Dominic Ford's "So You Think You Can Fuck" turns to the simplicity of the bedroom. Jimmy Clay and Tony Newport are just two guys in a bed who want to have sex. Being in a king-sized bed with Pornstar king Jimmy Clay makes us feel like a regular queen.



The Challenge
You know how in reality shows the contestants have a set amount of time to gather items for their challenges. In "So You Think You Can Fuck," the items are naturally fetish gear. The boys have to nab as much leather and chains as possible and wear them in a go-go dance-off to the tune of guest host Faith Michaels' club song "Fetish." Predictably, our personal favorite is Fleshbot Crush Object Jimmy Clay, who wiggles his butt and jiggles his cock while wearing nothing but an odd makeshift thong of skinny leather strings.

We love the drama of Mitch Vaughn calling no-show Rick McCoy, who was too drunk and hungover to attend the challenge. The ginger partyboi claims he was "sick," as likely an excuse now as it was last week. Rick better pull his hard-living ways together if he expects to win!

Matt Rush deserves a shout out for his delightful hosting skills. Coming off as fun and personable, he'd be a shoe-in as a career as a TV host (if stations could get over his pornstar past).

The Sex Scene
Once again, Jimmy Clay can do no wrong. He's the Chita Rivera of gay porn, turning the most lackluster scene/song into a nut-busting, bona fide showstopper. This time, he plays the top paired with bottom newbie Tony Newport in a standard bedroom fuck scene. Jimmy's cooing and moaning alone steals the scene, as he licks Tony's taint while murmuring, "I want that fuckin' asshole." Brilliant delivery of dialogue worthy of Shakespeare's forgotten horny half-brother. Jimmy's sexual talent is so strong, he even betters the performances of his scene partners. Poor Tony seems to fade into the background in his scenes, but with Jimmy and his perpetually rock hard cock being so turned on by Tony, it made us finally notice how sexy the newbie indeed is.

Our show queen self is reminded of the title song from MGM musical "Me and My Girl," where old pro Judy Garland made nervous first timer Gene Kelly shine in his big screen debut. The scene itself is technically just okay, since it doesn't improve on the wildly creative positions of this season's previous scenes. Still, Jimmy's expert fucking skills makes it rise above and shine like the harvest moon. Jimmy even makes Tony spooge while still inside of him; and Tony lets Jimmy keep fucking him long after cumming. Happily, Tony is finally starting to "cum" into his own.

Jimmy cums with all the gusto of a quarterback making the winning touchdown, practically shooting the length of a football field.

The Judging
"Live" from West Hollywood come the judges, who enjoy the simplicity of a standard bedroom scene. Then the understandable Jimmy Clay lovefest begins. Interestingly enough, Tommy Stone isn't on the Jimmy bandwagon, who begrudging concedes that he only just now noticed Jimmy's lips. How gracious! Tommy's favorite is our #2, Rick McCoy, whom we'd be more than thrilled to join on one of his all-night drinking binges. Scotty calls the performers "brown boys." Uh, they look white to us, or maybe lightly latino at the most. But, anyways...

Final Score
Scotty B.: 10
Jeremy Lucido: 8.5
Tommy Stone: 8.5
Jack Shamama: 8.5
Fleshbot's Very Own Cedric DeWittison: 8

· Episode 8: What's Your Fetish? (soyouthinkyoucanfuck.net)