The Gay Porn Blogger Who Makes Us Spontaneously Cum

Oooooh shit! The pained look on Riley Price's face isn't from that dildo up his ass, but from the evisceration he just got from blogger Shawn Baker, who writes for our personal favorite gay porn blog (besides us, of course) Nightcharm.com. In his latest post, Baker gives his opinion on the press release emailed to hundreds of us bloggers about Riley's recent retirement. With his usual erudite verve, Baker does not mince words at Riley's ridiculousness.

Because Gay Fleshbot is a kindler, gentler, fuzzier, wuzzier porn blog, we're discouraged from ripping new ones to pornstars when they act overly inane. Not Shawn Baker, who brilliant parses Riley's self-aggrandizing retirement ramblings with a one-two sucker punch to the groin and the ego.

Our favorite digs:

I can't even convey how little Riley Price - sounds like a Little Rascal or something - means to me on a basic human level, so little in fact that I can't even be bothered to research him.

and:

...it's possible that Riley is just an invention. Hell, he could be a photo composite of any number of generic, dead-eyed A&F models for all I know or care. I could give a shit.

followed by:

The only entertainment value to be gleaned from this mess in my inbox is the hilarious po-faced tone - as if Streisand or Garbo were calling it quits and going into isolation - combined with unbelievable douche Riley's lunatic self-aggrandizement.

For the record, we have no issue with Riley, and rather love him, or at least his ass.

Considering the ever congenial Colby Keller's heavily publicized run-in with Riley, one can conclude that Riley's got a whole batcave full of cra-cra flying about in his head. He's cute, he's got an ass we'd rim for days without a break, but yikes, he seems like wrassling with a manic-depressive python on crack.

Anyway, the point of this post is not to disparage Riley, but to shower love on Shawn Baker, the witty writer of Nightcharm.com, whose posts consistently enlighten and entertain, and whose rant about Riley got us tingly in all the right places.

· I'm Not Afraid To Eat An Ice Cream Cone Anymore: The Life of Riley (nightcharm.com)