Maybe because that Superbowl XX%LXVI$&@ happens on Sunday, but many celebrities this week are jocks, or wanna-be jocks, or would look luscious in (and out of) a jock strap. Gear up, sports fans. It's game time and the goal is shirtless celebrity sexiness!
Better yet, the goal's shirtless celeb full-frontal nudity! Before we see the jocks, how ‘bout some cocks? In the lastest episode of Showtime's "Shameless," Zach McGowan showed all his goods, repeatedly, to the sound of our schoolgirl squeals. He plays a sex addict whose addiction we'd gladly feed.
The brave young tight-bodied Zach McGowan even treated viewers to a close-up. Norma Desmond would have been proud. "Shameless?" There's nothing to be ashamed about here.
Did Zach McGowan use a fluffer? He looks pretty darn happy here. Showtime and the "Shameless" team deserve applause for being bold enough to feature prolonged male dick on American television. Zach deserves a special Emmy for being bravely groundbreaking. Can other actors follow suit to round out the nominations?
Aaaaand for good measure, here's Zach McGowan's ass.
Shemar Moore's not a pro athlete, but he'd still look sultry while sweating on the field. Or even better changing in the locker room. Ellen seems to be the first lesbian is history who gets men to strip so often. (Only last week it was Mario Lopez.) Shemar strips to promote his TV show "Criminal Minds," a PR stunt of which we approve.
Now, on to the jocks! Novak Djokovic got orgasmic after his grand slam final win over Rafael Nadal at last month's Australian Open. After winning the longest final in the Open's history, Djokovic went nutso with joy, tearing off his shirt and stampeding his svelte self around the court. It may be his cake, but the icing is all ours.
Superbowl XX%LXVI$&@ is naturally going to be chock full of much ballyhooed TV ads, making a game that should run a couple hours and change drag on interminably. Somewhere in the revitalized detritus of crass commercialization will be soccer stud David Beckham hawking his H&M underwear line. We'll skip the game, and just watch it here.
Finally, ex-gay-for-pay "Real World" porn pup Dustin Zito appeared on MTV's "The Challenge: Battle of the Exes." Who cares what the show's about when we've got this shot of Dustin wearing nothing but Speedos and covered in honey. Why? God knows. But we'd be lying if we didn't say we wished we were a honey bee.