“Rammed by Sam” and Michael Sam’s Boyfriend

May 16, 2014
VINCENT-THRICE

It was the kiss heard 'round the world. When openly gay defensive lineman Michael Sam was drafted by the St. Louis Rams last week, he and boyfriend Vito Cammisano celebrated with a kiss on national television, and the collective panties of ant-gay crusaders nationwide went immediately into a bunch.

Now Assence Films has just announced, according to XBiz (link below), that they are producing a film titled "Rammed by Sam" as their first gay title.

The move was prompted as a fuck you to a bigoted lobbyist.

Assence said the movie was immediately put into production when Jack Burkman, an extreme Christian lobbyist called for a relentless national boycott of whichever team drafted Missouri defensive end Michael Sam. Burkman released a statement saying,"Visa and the Rams will learn that when you trample the Christian community and Christian values, there will be a terrible financial price to pay. Openly gay football players send a terrible message to our youth about morality. Somebody needs to step up because the moral fiber of the nation is eroding." Assence Films CEO Mike Kulich said he has stepped up to defend that moral fiber, but from Sam's and the NFL's corner. His response is the 115-minute parody that follows Sam, a gay NFL prospect as he is drafted to a pro NFL team.

Wait, it gets better...

The movie follows the closeted bigot named Jack as he gathers his troops to try to derail Sam's success. Eventually, Sam confronts Jack and "sparks fly when Jack eventually gets bent over by the defensive end and Sam converts Jack from a tight end to a wide receiver." "We here at Assence Films believe in equal rights for everyone and do not tolerate bigots or hatred of any kind," Kulich said. "The fact of the matter is that the majority of homophobes are actually closeted guys that just need to be loosened up and stretched out. Just look at Larry Craig and Ed Schrock."

The film will be streamed exclusively via a partnership with SkweezMe.com on June 15 and is scheduled for a retail release in July.

Surprisingly, this isn't the only Michael Sam related porn story this week. The site Str8UpGayPorn had the exclusive that Cammisano's last boyfriend was Guys In Sweatpants studio owner and performer Austin Wilde.