In the upcoming weeks, tons of new TV shows will be hitting cable boxes and DVR machines from sea to shining sea. While the shows seem relentlessly gal heavy (like the already insufferable "Whitney"), a few feature celebrity manhunk that may, just may, make the show worth watching. Here's our guide to the season's best shirtless bets.
"Two and a Half Men"
Season Premiere: CBS, September 19
With Little Miss Douchebag Charlie Sheen gone, Ashton Kutcher steps in to play one of the two men in this extremely popular, long running sitcom—a show we've never seen because, well, why? Ashton tempts us to take a peek, because Ashton loves stripping for the camera. Even on a recent episode of "Ellen," he slips off his robe to prance about naked. We don't think Ellen's interested, although we're sure she faked it. Let's hope his sitcom features just as much lovely bare flesh.
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"The Playboy Club"
Premieres: NBC, September 19
Yes, yes, this show and ABC's "Pan Am" are obviously "Mad Men" rip-offs, but "The Playboy Club" features high-voltage sexstud Eddie Cibrian. He plays a high-powered attorney caught up in the mayhem and murder—yes, murder—at the famed Chicago nightspot during the early '60s. With the blatant sex in the air, chances are grand Cibrian will slip out of his shirts on more than one episode. Above is a YouTube mash-up of his hottest moments from his previous TV shows.
Bonus: Hey, theatre queens, Broadway's own Laura Benanti stars as a power hungry bunny who lends her mah-velous singing voice to several episodes. What's a crime is that the official NBC show site fails to mention she's a Tony Award Winner and multiple nominee. Someone tell Hollywood that Broadway is cool again.
"The A-List: Dallas"
Premieres: Logo, October 10
Get ready to be further mentally asphyxiated by vapid sass as Logo's infamous A-List series giddy-ups to the wild, wussy west. No gay expects much from this show, although every gay will be watching. We can certainly expect lots of shirtlessness, like from random new cast member Chase Hutchinson above. What faux-fab life does he lead in Dallas? Do we really care?
"Against the Wall"
Showtime: Lifetime, Sundays
We cheated. This show has been playing all summer and we'd never even heard of it until we recently got the photo above of Brandon Quinn. The show is about a female detective (c'mon, it's Lifetime) who does whatever female detectives do on television for women. Brandon plays her shirtless brother. Our interest pretty much stops there.