His Platform Is Simple: My Dick Is Bigger Than Yours

Danish Prime Minister candidate John Erik Wagner just pulled a first for politicians. He released a campaign poster where he's wearing nothing but a cowboy hat, gun, and holster, and in which his uncut Danish cock is clearly visible. That's a level of transparency we're just not ready for here in the States. 

According to The Local (link below), Wagner's apparently a perennial election also-ran, but his stunts have been bringing him—and more importantly his platform—some much needed attention.

The 52-year-old from the Copenhagen district of Amager has been running in parliamentary, local and regional elections since 2005. Most of that was with little attention but that changed in 2013 when he burst onto the stage in his customary cowboy get-up during a live televised municipal election debate to protest the exclusion of smaller parties.

“Why should we [smaller parties] sit here like extras in our own campaign? Huh? Can you tell me that? This is no fair election,” he yelled during DR’s broadcast before being escorted off the stage.

I have a feeling a lot of stories Wagner tells end with "And then I was escorted off the stage." So what, precisely, is this platform of his that needs such full-on "look at my dick" attention?

Wagner is running on a ten-point platform that includes closing all of the nation’s job centres, changing local election rules, making dentist visits free like doctor visits and structuring the labour market so that all workers have six months on the job and six months of holiday.

Alright then, that's... Well, I can get behind most of that. What are the other six points though? Is it five blanks and then the word "Profit"? We can only stare hypnotically at his dick and wonder. 

Via The Local