This Video Game Has Our Joystick All Sticky

Sure, we've gone a few rounds with Laura Croft in the past, but she doesn't really get our engine revving. Leave that to Kingdom Cum, a fun and sexy new game from a cruising website.

Yes, Kingdom Cum isn't going to win any video game awards for originality, but the Squirt.org distraction will help you while away the hours when you're not looking at porn or cruising for public sex. Well, if its cruising you want, you can let your avatar do it here, as you control a little man who searches the woods for other men to have sex with. Of course you have to jump from platform to platform and avoid woodland creatures to get it. Damn, it's harder to get dick here than when we went to that ex-gay convention. But, just like then, when you finally get it, it's damn worth while. Collect enough condoms to shag all the boys you want (safe only, yay!) and then advance to the next level. It's actually pretty difficult, but your odds drastically improve if you use both hands for the controls. We never thought of that before!

·Kingdom Cum
(squirtgame.com)