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Joe Jonas Vogue Chest Hair Will Wreck You For Vogue Chest Hair

CELEBRITY

 

Boy are my cheeks red after claiming for years that Nick Jonas is by far the most attractive Jonas brother, beating out Joe Jonas and the lesbian one by a mile. While Nick is obviously still more attractive than Joe, the gap, unlike my hole right now, is narrowing, as evident in these sexy as hell pictures from Joe's spread in goddamn Vogue Mexico! Someone's arrived. 

I'm making Joe the official Jonasty for the day, because his brother isn't doing shit over on his Insta account, and we've got to give dick-wetting credit where dick-wetting credit is due. Joe's mustache is more of a game changer than any of us could have imagined, and along with his eyebrows, he's become the Zachary Quinto/80's gay pornstar/Luigi fantasy that the world didn't know it needed.

The real stars of this spread are obviously Jonasty for the day's chest hair follicles, which weave together to create a tapestry of masculinity that I'd just love to use as a jizz target! Joe is giving face for days, houndstooth hipster power clashing realness, and about as much damn hair as my hole can handle on a Tuesday, and I am lyyyving for it! Am I just lonely and horny at 3:00 PM, or is Joe the man to beat off to in these Vogue Mexico pics? Spillz! 

 

Photo Credit: Vogue Mexico


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