You love rentboys. You love straight boys. Why not combine the best of both worlds and hire a straight rentboy? The stars have aligned and yes, it’s true, they really do exist—and the site that gives you these seemingly mythological creatures in all their glory, StraightRentBoys.com, has a particularly hot update this week.

“What’d you do last night?” “Oh, you know. Just ate some dinner and chilled in front of the TV watching old episodes of ‘CSI’ and then went to bed. What about you, OhMy432556?” “I sucked my own dick and filmed it for the internet.” “I fucking hate yo