We may never find out the true story behind Julie Andrews’ signature song from “Mary Poppins” … but if you feel like twisting your tongue (or something else) around a bunch of hot Asian muscle boys caught from behind instead, have at it.

Advanced J/O techniques and intricate dildo-based choreography all have their place in XTube clips , of course … but when you’re as hung as porn pup Jason Crew here, just stepping out of your briefs is an eye-popping experience in itself.

Fashionista types may already be familiar with Bernard Willhelm, the edgy German-born designer who has worked with trendsetters such as Vivienne Westwood and Stella McCartney. In previous seasons, Willhelm has created a buzz in the fashion world for donating entire collections to museums and hiring abtatsic Belgian street toughs to model his menswear collection. Borrowing a page from the Thierry Mugler and Jean-Paul Gaultier school of marketing—when in doubt, hire a pornstar or two or three!—he’s now signed Fleshbot boyfriend-to-be Francois Sagat to model his highly conceptual Fall 2007 collection. Think superhero meets pornstar with lots of lycra, spandex and masks (an an occasional Peter Berlin wig thrown in for good measure.)

We first saw Jesse Santana last spring in Falcon’s “Longboard”, when the fun-sized tatted hottie was hanging ten with Derek Brodie (er, we mean Brodie Sinclair). Obviously he was destined for bigger and better things, so it came as no surprise to find out that Jet Set has just signed the “avid equestrian” (who “has been riding horses since he can remember”) to an exclusive contract … and is already promoting his appearance in three upcoming releases.

Former college football player (and current Randy Blue discovery) Christopher Ashlee has eyes to die for, a mouth-watering set of perfect abs, and a smile that can melt the hearts of even stony porn fans like us at twenty paces. And that’s just what he has going on above the waist.

Paris will be hosting several big-ticket sports events this fall … and what better way to attract tourists to the City of Lights than to launch a new advertising campaign showing rugby players engaging in full-on French kissing? Works for us. What will those wacky French ad execs think of next?