Chris Pratt Is Back To Not Looking Scary In New Beach Candids

August 12, 2019
HIS_EXCELLENCY

A few years ago, after consuming one of every male enhancer available for purchase at the gas station checkout, Chris Pratt ballooned into a shredded beast of a man, and his looks as well as his A-list status emboldened him to dump Anna Faris despite being an outspoken Christian and advocate for traditional family values. What goes good with Jesus. Weed and hookers yaaaaas! JK I stan.

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Six months no beer. #GOTG Kinda douchey to post this but my brother made me.
A post shared by chris pratt (@prattprattpratt) on Jul 6, 2013 at 11:06pm PDT

Well actually I didn't stan until I saw these brand new pap pics of Chris Pratt and his new wifey Katherine Terminator and Rob Lowe (according to Radar Online, Chris and Rob are in a celeb bromance*) hanging out on the beach in Santa Barbara, CA. The gas station male enhancers have finally made their way through Chris' system, and he's back to looking like the adorable cuddly Andy from Parks and Recreation that we fell in lust with all those years back. He no longer looks like a douche on the outside, but is he still a douche on the inside?

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Rolo and I got the album cover. Now we’re going offline for a while to focus our music. Stay tuned. Big things coming.
A post shared by chris pratt (@prattprattpratt) on May 26, 2019 at 10:31pm PDT