July 10, 2019 | Posted in Celebrity by
If you were alive two hundred years ago then you might remember a show named Jackass. It starred Johnny Knoxville and his daredevil exhibitionist friends, and while you didn't really watch it because you weren't a straight middle schooler with a singing bass mounted above his dedicated Pog table, you caught the show's highlights, and since most of the stunts involved Knoxville and pals' cocks and balls, you liked it. A lot. Pourquoi? Because, you were a gay (as you'd find out years later) middle schooler with a Lisa Frank kitten poster hung above his dedicated Pog table TYVM. AM I PROJECTING?
Johnny Knoxville was genuinely sexy and genuinely had a great bod which was visible a ton on Jackass and the subsequent big-screen spinoffs. He had some friends of varying degrees of hotness - and more importantly cleanliness - and one of those was Steve-O. And now he's getting in on #TheBottleCapChallenge. It's a viral sensation that entails roundhouse kicking the top off a bottle. Here's Justin Bieber doing it:
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And here's Steve-O doing it. But like with his dick:
— Steve-O (@steveo) July 9, 2019
Now if we could just get Justin Bieber doing it with his dick, we'd have a fucking story that my middle school self would have approved of!