First off, for those of you who assume I stroke out while creating my headlines, just know that yes, I do, and also that Google prioritizes posts with headlines containing sixty characters or less, AND you guys know I have a lot to say, so it's fucking hard for me! The super cute twinkilicious actor Nick Robinson stars as a confused gay teen in the new trailer for Love, Simon, and he also happened to show off his frankly lickable ass in Being Charlie (2016)! The twenty-two-year-old Robinson has an adorable face, pouty lips up to here, a thick head of light brown locks that you could lose a dick in, and an all-around perfect twink bod, and seeing him as a high schooler with the gay tingly feelings could turn out to be really fap-worthy! I mean, touching and heartwarming. I mean, touch my warm hard on Nick.
Sew, here's the jizz-st of Love, Simon according to Vulture:
Here’s an adorable-looking, John Hughes–style high-school movie where everyone is mysteriously attractive — this time for the gay kids out there. In Love, Simon, based on the book Simon vs. the Homo Sapiens Agenda, the closeted Simon (Nick Robinson) falls in love with an anonymous classmate online, while keeping his secret from his family and friends.
My dick gets about as wet for a straight guy playing a gay role as it would for Emma Stone playing Pocahontas, which she probably will do, so I'm going to go ahead and file this movie under "gradual progress" rather than "groundbreaking LBGT achievement." Headlines are fawning over the simple but relatively unexplored premise of a "normal" teen movie centered around a gay character, and if the PG-13 rating means that we get some handsy janitor closet action featuring Simon and some hot high school skank, I'll fawn over it too! But only if that exact scenario happens. You can catch Love, Simon in theaters March 16, 2018. Would you do what Simon says? Spillz!