Thomas Has A Fat Dick

Someone whose name is probably not Thomas, but who the Internet is telling me is named Thomas, sports a toned to goddamn death bod and girth-tastic cock to boot! Tom takes to Snapchat to share his gifts with some lucky recipient, who we'll just pretend is a guy. He follows up his playful greeting "Howdy" with multiple dick out pics as well as the caption "nudes on the clock lmao." lmao, indeed. While we don't get to see Tom at 12 o'cock, or even 9 o'cock, he's looking pretty damn good at 6! 

And as a little PSA: Razors don't kill people, people kill people. Wait, what. Nevermind. Just don't fucking shave your pubes.

H/T: sprinkledpeen