March 2, 2017 | Posted in gay by
Well, slow claps and fast faps for Mr. Jason Statham! The manliest of all manly men men men out there graces the cover of the latest issue of Men's Health with his ripped, fuzzy bod on full display. If you're a prostitute like me, you might have thought for a brief second that we were seeing a freakish bulge on the magazine's cover, but it's just his fist. Which, could be equally exciting for some of you!
The real kicker with this new spread with Men's Health is that Jason Statham is forty-fucking-nine years old! Since he obviously spent at least half of his life in a cryogenic chamber, Statham is just now getting around to having his first kid with obnoxiously gorgeous model Rosie Huntington-Whiteley. I'm assuming that their super child will either save us all, or destroy everything. Here's the jizz-st of his interview:
On keeping up with his age:
I’m moving better than I used to. I’m feeling pretty nimble. It’s about the whole thing: training, eating, sleeping… all of those have a massive impact on how you feel.
And I’m doing better at all of those things. Sly Stallone’s got 20 years on me and still looks good so he’s part of my inspiration.
Umm, hm. On his image as a badass who would bang the fuck out of you and then roundhouse kick you to death until with his cum still inside you. Or, something that's not my fantasy:
Ha! These public labels, the things the media like to paint you as, I don’t really look at them. I see myself as a pretty standard sort of chap, really.
I keep a lot of my pals close to me and I think that keeps my feet on the ground. I don’t know if they’ll say the same thing! But we all come from the same place.
On working in Hollywood:
Hollywood has a caustic effect on a lot of people. It’s a cruel business. You can get a big head about things. But what goes up must come down.
Check out Jason Statham's full spread for Men's Health in the gallery!
Via Daily Mail