Colton Haynes Shakes Ass on Snapchat, You’re a Top

August 8, 2016
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Colton Haynes Supports Team USA With His Bubble Butt

We all know how Colton Haynes hates attention, so I really sympathize that this video of the 28-year-old actor shaking his ass was accidentally posted to his Snapchat. It's just like Draymond Green! I JK. The gorgeous openly gay Colton still has a couple of months before he can dress in Disney drag for Halloween (and this will be his first year doing it as an out gay man, so watch out world!), and while biding his time until October got eyeballs by shaking his UH-DORABLE bubble butt for Snapchat. Because gays are the best, the quick 10 second Snap has been turned into a 46 second long video for our enjoyment (bottom of page).

Colton was supporting Team USA on Friday during the Olympics by wearing Tommy Hilfiger pants and red, white, and blue boat shoes. He then did this ass shake, which it turns out carries even more emotional weight than even the heavily endorsed patriotic outfit. In an apparently related Tweet, Haynes gave a message of support for all of his fans who might be doubting themselves:

Baby you're a firework! While you're looking at Haynes' plump cheeks that are practically bursting out of those khakis, you might be pondering "Am I... a top?" and the answer is yes, yes you are now. I was actually having a conversation with a friend this weekend about tops and bottoms. While I just assume that most gays are bottoms until proven otherwise - and I will help with the proving otherwise if necessary - my friend, who says he has to feel extremely "comfortable" to bottom (aka he fucking hates it), seems to think that most gays are tops.

If I had only known about this Colton Haynes ass shaking video before our conversation, I would have agreed with my friend wholeheartedly! BE WARNED: Only watch this video if you're ready to be a power top for the rest of your life. Colton might have just caused the downfall of gay society with his bubble butt.

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